Shintou Fairy by Poe
TEAM: Solo Hero
KIT CLASS: Master Training
Hall Of Fame!
Survival - 8 wins!
Brutal - 1 fatalaties!
League Wins: 8
League Losses: 3
Out Of League Wins: 0
Out of League Losses: 0
Total Wins: 8
Total Losses: 3
Une Vandell - Win 0-0
Megumi Smith: Anti-Landon - Win 0-0
Great Student Nanami! - Win 0-0
The Fallen Tower Humanity - Win 0-0
Iltanaius de Namati - Win 0-0
Voczyk - Win 0-0
GrayMalkin - Win 0-0
Ryan, Evil Genius - Win 0-0
The Victorian - Loss 0-0
Emerald Nyght - Loss 0-0
Aoi Kitsune - Loss 0-0
It was a dark time for Khazan...naughtiness held sway over the minds and hearts of the men of the multiverse. Battles would become pornos, fanfics threatened to turn into lemons...the worse pervert ever to plague womankind had even briefly (VERY briefly) been made an admin. Yes, indeed it was a bad time for anybody who possessed boobies. Finally, unable to stand the R ratedness any longer...one of the bitchier, shoujo-bent Powers That Be decided something must be done to reclaim the multiverse from the forces of depravity... Thus, she created an Agent of Purity. A being that would be able to sense the naughtiness that lurked in the heart of men and exercise it through the use of a large heavy blunt object. A being that would be so sickingly cute, innocent, and annoying that only someone with the mind set of a six year old girl or an otaku fan boy would not want to kill it on sight. That being was the Shintou Fairy. Given a hammer of immense power, (that I'm sure also has some sort of semi-plausible enchantment that would allow somebody only six inches tall to even pick the damn thing up) and a set of paradoxly skimpy, completely useless armor; she was then sent out into the world in hope of rehabilitating Khazan with a special, spectacularly violent brand of tough love, massive head trauma, and possibly brain damage... or if nothing else, to at least take a few of the pervs out of the gene pool.
Personality: "I'm finally here! WAI!! WAI!! W!- Wha? 'There's too many @$%#% air headed kawaii anime girls running around Khazan yelling out moronic stuff in broken Japanese already'? Heavens, I had no idea, sir... I'll try to cut back. And you should really try to watch you language too, sir... it's not very polite to use bad words. ... You want me to 'Go $#@%' myself? What does '$#@%' mean? Wait, I think that was on the list of stuff I'm supposed to bop people for. If you don't mind, sir, would you please wait here...I need to check and see if I'm supposed to hit you or not. ?! Hey!! Come back here!!"
| Weak BELOW normal human strength - |
can bench press 50 pounds (maybe).
|Superior This fighter can dodge, weave and move |
with the grace of an Olympic gymnast.
|Standard Normal human endurance. ||Mind:|
|Weak BELOW normal human mental power. |
Not the sharpest tack in the drawer.
The Mallet Of Longinous
Yes, The Mallet Of Longinous, the long lost legendary hammer believed to have once bopped the head of Christ after he made an inappropriate comment about what color Mary Magdalene's panties were. Capable of going through the defenses of even a naughty god, it is truly one of the most formable hammers in existence. And when you consider how a normal hammer in the hands of a pissed off anime girl is enough to knock out anything short of a super saiya-jin, this is a frightening level of power we're talking about here. "Huh? Nani? Rip-off? Oh my goodness, what do you mean, sir? 'Shin Seiki what?"
- Power: Bashing Attack
- Double Damage Causes Double the damage to Avatar class characters.
- Seeker This attack hunts and follows its target.
- Multi Attack Attack can hit multiple times during one strike.
Caught In The Act
Um... what's the most polite general audience way I can put this... Most of the Shintou Fairy's victims aren't exactly in the best um... position to immediately start fighting back when she attacks. And really, it was what ever they were doing that caused her to start bopping them in the first place. Not that that there's anything wrong with what they were doing... oh no, I'm sure that's a perfectly normal, healthy way of um... reliving tension for an adult and perhaps their consenting legal aged partner... "What? No sir... actually that sheep really doesn't look she's consenting to that very much at all... you are a very very bad man, sir. *Nod, Nod* *BOP*" But right or wrong, it still takes them a few moments to pull up their pants, take... something out, or even undo the restraints "Gosh... doesn't that chaff, sir?" before they can defend themselves. "Oh my! *BOP* Oh miss, please put on a robe first... that's actually kinda really gross. I really don't think you're supposed to pierce that. Ewww... ecchi!! *BOP*"
- Power: Paralysis
- Auto-Hit This mental attack hits the target automatically, but may or may not effect them.
Where's the fly swatter?!!
You'd be surprised how durable a tiny little thing like her could be. Her magical little barely-clothed body seems to possess some sort of natural resiliency and elasticity that's just enough to keep her from being squashed almost entirely not unlike a bug. " Gee... trying to stick me in that microwave WAS a very mean thing to do to poor little me... Yes sir, I'm afraid IT IS for your own good that I *BOP* start hitting you harder now. *BOP* How else are we gonna knock that naughtiness out of your sick *BOP* dirty old head, silly? Hee-hee *BOP*"
- Power: Armor Skin
- Kit Power Link: Master Training
- Reinforced Defenses Defense blocks Armor Piercing attacks.
You think a wasp buzzing around you is a pain in the rear to hit? Imagine trying to swat one flying at about 30 miles an hour. Then imagine having to do that while trying to dodge Mjolnir on steroids. NOW imagine trying to do all that with your pants around you ankles because you were... in the middle of um... doing... 'stuff' when you got attack... but hey, at least you have that nice handy pr0- err... news? Yes, news magazine to roll up and try to defend yourself with. "Hentai!! Don't touch me with that, it's all sticky!! Baka!" *BOP* *BOP*
"If you're not lucky enough to catch them in the act, you got to wait till they start doing something naughty before you can... help them. Those are the rules and breaking the rules would be naughty after all... (And I can't very well bop myself, of course, that'd be silly.) Can't do anything to change them and we couldn't use pheromones to provoke someone into being naughty, oh my no... even if you do know that deep in their hearts they're nasty nasty perverts and need to be punished. Nope, that wouldn't be allowed.
BAD!! NO!! PERVERT!! *BOP*
"*Cough* What? Oh no, sir... didn't you read the 'Counter Attack' description? I would never so something like make my tiny little (though really... proportionally speaking, they are quite large for my size don't ya think? *Wink, wink*) chest bounce up and down in front of you. *Blush* Gosh no... suffering such massive, though COMPLETELY necessary, head trauma must simply be causing you to think such silly things. It really is quite common; I hear stuff like that all the time. *Nod, nod*"
- Power: Pheremones
- Auto-Hit This mental attack hits the target automatically, but may or may not effect them.
- Melee Attack Attack usable only hand to hand.
- Weakness: Limited Uses -Multi-Use
- Weakness: Not usable in terrain Swamp
For the sake of being able to track down and identify perverts better, the Shintou Fairy's little mind (such as it is) was created to be extra sensitive to disturbances in the Naughty ForceÃÂÃÂ; what gives a hentai his horniness... It is an energy field that surrounds all perverts and makes them want to *cough* use their light sabers and- "AHHHHH!!! It's George Lucas's Dark Lawyers of Sith!! Oro? 'Lawsuit?!' *BOP* *BOP* BAD UNHOLY DOO-DOO HEADS OF *WHAP* THE DARK SIDE!!! *BOP* *CRASH*"
- Power: Telepathy
- Weakness: Not usable in terrain Bar Fight
From The Shintou Fairy Mission Statement- (As required by the Powers That Be Middle Management) "Ya see, since Khazan is such a big place, I mean Really Big... no bigger than that... or that... .... BAKA!!! Pull your pants back up!! *BOP* *BOP* Love was considered important enough to require several PTB/Gods/Elementals/Spirits/Etc to watch over it all. My boss, naturally, got the kawaii, lovely, and romantic side of Love; full of young girls dreaming of their princes and stuff like that. *Siiigh* And then there's... 'Him', the one who got put in charge of all the nasty physical stuff. I never really understood all that. What's wrong with just holding hands and maybe if you REALLY care about the person, a quick little peck on the cheek? Why do people have to go and bring *shudder* 'Those Body Parts' into it and end up all flushed and sticky? Anyway, that's where I come in. One of the Powers That Be created me, after she had a really bad date with... err, 'Him Who I Am Forbidden To Name', to go out into the multiverse and destroy his naughty influence and punish those that follow his ways. See? *Lifts up part of her skirt (what little there is of it) to reveal a tiny little tattoo on her hip that reads 'Property e and ÃÂÃÂ of The Powers That Be, Department Of Creative Population Control Solutions. Do Not Fondle Under Penalty of Hammer.'* ...Okay, you can stop looking at it now. *Blink, blink* Heeellloooo? ...Is that a nosebleed? AHHH!! Perv!!! *BOP *BOP* *BOP* Umm... where was I? Right! Wai!! And She gave me this really big hammer and this outfit that protects me from the sickie hentai perverts and even all those bad, bad feelings and umm... 'physical urges' (what ever those are) that I shouldn't be having. Cool, huh?"
Magical Fairy Uppers
Oh that poor girl... The stress of the job finally got to be too much for her I guess. There's just so many perverts in Khazan now, it's really just too much for one little magical being to keep up with. I mean, considering that, it's really no wonder she's turned to drugs. I hear she's been doing Stimulants you see... trying to keep herself awake and full of energy so she can keep working overtime. Tsk, tsk... just look at her, all nervous, jittery, and hyper. Maybe someone ought to go and take away her bottle of pills and tell her she has a problem and it's for her own good? "WHAT?! I'm not a... addicted, I can quit anytime I want, yes really! O-only naughty, naughty people have drug problems!! HEY!! GIMME THAT BOTTLE BACK!!! *BOPBOPBOPBOPBOP*"
- Power: Super Speed
- Weakness: Power in Item -Hard to Loseitem
- Weakness: Not usable in terrain Low Gravity