Location: The Bottom, Lowtown Khazan
Team: The Syndicate
Strength: standard (rank 1)
Agility: weak (rank 0)
Mind: standard (rank 1)
Body: standard (rank 1)
Spirit: (rank )
Charisma: (rank )
Infamy Points: 549
Personal Wins: 29
Personal Losses: 12
Team Wins: 0
Team Losses: 0
Tourney Wins: 0
Tourney Losses: 0
Hey De Luca,
Remember me? Your little Sheila BangBang, ya remember that don’t ya. All your dumbass friends used to think I was from Bangkok. You called me your little China Doll. Idiot! I’m from Laos. I just never had the heart to tell your dumb ass. There was always something about you, man. You weren’t a looker by any means and you sure weren't the smartest guy in the world. Sure you had a little street smarts, but I guess it was just that you were so dang tough. What with all those scars and all. Yeah, that was kinda hot. Man, you were one hard piece of work. I should know; I’ve seen you in action better than anybody. Hee hee…Buk hum noi. Don’t get your hopes up. The nerve of you, ya jerk! I was just looking for a little fun: someone to love and someone to love me, but noooo. I get the biggest loser this side of Lowtown. You just going to up and leave me huh? Going to pretend like this never existed? I heard you went and joined some shit detective operation? Oh and don’t think I didn’t hear about that little Angel’s of Mercy nannay! Tony…bak ha meung! I used to sit up at night wondering if you still thought about me. But that’s okay cus Sheila BangBang is the leader of the Bottom Boys now…or should I say, the Bottom Girls. That’s right…and I took over your old operations too. I’m working hand and hand with those Syndicate boys. Booyah bitch! Take that ya filthy traitor. You are soooo dead when I see you too. I guess I oughta tell ya the deal. So pay attention loser, cus I’m only going to be saying this once.
See, I started seeing the big picture when that prick with the cigars showed up. You were going to shoot for the stars. Problem was you had no intention on taking me with you, did you? No. Cus you’re a punk. So here we are, like me and a couple of the girlfriends…all proud of our big boys. We see you guys gearing up. But, we notice you punks ignoring us too. That’s how you pigs are. You get a little money and suddenly it’s all night parties and hoes. You boys love your hoes, don’t ya? But that’s okay because while the cats away, the mice will play. Remember the Kingsport Jewelry Heist a few years back. Yeah man, that was all us. Booyah baby! You’re not the only one that can score. Oh, but that’s not all. Cus see, when we finished that heist, we drove all the way back to the Bottom to celebrate with our boys. But, there were no boys. You got Carla “Cutey Honey” and Georgia Girl’s baby daddies killed, ya dirty loser. Big Lou…dead. Pretty Pete…dead. The cigar fella from the Syndicate told us how you killed them. He told us how you murdered them and ran off with that lousy dui bitch from the Angels. I hope you like her, Tony. Cus, I’m going to blow her F’n brains out. I’m going to make you watch every minute of it and when I’m finished, me and the girls are going to cut your lying tongue out.
I know what your thinking; how did my little China Doll become the resident lethal, killing-machine, kick-ass, ninja-assassin, leader of the Bottom? Well sit back, De Luca cus you ain’t going to have a chance to hear this when I come to your side of town. Bang Bang! You know what I mean?
So, we’re sitting here with this oversized diamond and we can’t figure out who to take it to. Sammy “The Brick” or that diamond dealer from Jersey, Goldie. We figure Goldie would pay more, but the Brick said he would kill you if he didn’t get his money you owed him. And back then, I cared…asshole. So, we settled on the Brick. So, I call em up and tells em the score. He’s like cool. I’ll come pick it up from Tony later. That’s when a knock came at the door. No, not just a knocking but some jerk is pounding the shit out of it. “Cutey Honey” stole a look through the peep hole and lo and behold, it’s the stinky cigar man. He looks like fried shit, Tony. We open the door and he comes pouring through smelling like yesterday’s trash. He falls into the couch and immediately starts dialing for back up. The nerve of this guy; calling for back up in our backyard. This punk don’t realize that Bottom Girls are twice as dangerous as the guys. So, of course something is up and we ain’t just going to sit here and let the bankroll die. That’s when we go into battle mode. You may have been a dipshit Tony, but you trained us well. Plus, this guy was paying you and the boys therefore, he was paying us. Well, that is until this little diamond heist. So I’m all like, Pen Jung Dai? You know. You going to tell us what’s going on or are you just going to bleed all over my Tony’s couch. As for stinky cigar man, he just throws down the phone, pulls out a pistol, looks at me and says…”Run and hide.”
What! Fuck that shit!
Three the Hard Way
Commander: superior (rank 2)
Who’s this guy think we are? Obviously, he needs the girls to handle his business. So I’m like, “Rally up girls. It’s time to ride.” And the girls jump into positions immediately. Cutey Honey heads upstairs to play look out. Georgia Girl hits the backdoor to make sure there won’t be no flanking. Me, I look old stinky cigar man right in the eye and say, “Now, watch how we do it in the bottom.” Yeah baby! It was so awesome, I was all like, “What!?…” Right in his face.
So, no sooner do I set things up when Cutey is screaming like a damn banshee upstairs. These girls…I love em. A F’n well oiled machine is what they are. So, whoever did the number on stinky cigar face was already on us. So, I don’t waste anymore time. I go have a look see out the front window and pow! That little weasel almost blows my head off. The nerve of this loser, he’s walking down 4th and 15th like he owns the place, shooting at our crib. Then the lunatic starts yelling, “Risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.” What the hell is that supposed to mean? The guy’s crazy. He just keeps saying it like a mantra. Then, cigar face starts going on about, “His name is Risk…” Stop! I don’t care. The little punk shot at me. He dies. “Kill the creep!” I yell and you know the girls. I can already hear Georgia girl scampering around to the side of the building in those big ass boots of hers. Oh yeah, It’s on. All hell’s about to break loose in the Bottom, baby.
Piercing Weapon: standard (rank 1)
- Ranged Attack
So this guy is firing his little Beretta’s at the building when suddenly the bottom drops out. From above, Cutey Honey unloads all over the place with her custom pink Alexander Arms Tactical Semi-automatic baby. She’s all like, “Honey Flash!” and then she tosses that blond hair of hers and just shatters the guy to a million pieces. Crazy thing is…he literally shatters. What the Fuck? The guy hits the pavement and burst into chunks. The chunks start going all weird and shit. They start turning into more of the guy. Then, two of the duplicates get up and start rolling and ducking for cover. It’s extreme man! One rises and starts firing back at Cutey. She’s taking cover, but still reaching over the ledge and taking pop shots. F’n gangsta! You should’ve seen the look on stinky cigar guy’s face. I guess he thought he was just going to hold up until back up arrived. F’ back up, Tony. We defends ourselves in the Bottom, you know that. …and what’s worse…now, it’s my turn to get me some!
Piercing Weapon: superior (rank 2)
I pull out the Hammer too…the big boy. You know the one. You know we always liked the big guns and that 20 gauge Remington you had was just what the doctor ordered. So, I’m kicking the front door down, like Boom! One down. Click Clack. Boom! Two down. Click Clack. Then the last one starts letting loose with those flipping Berettas. Please tell me how this guy is replicating the gun, I don’t know. I don’t care. I fall back, but I hear Cutey back up and ready for more upstairs. Bad news though, apparently, the spray from her gun is causing this guy to photocopy like Kinkos; whereas my gun was laying the guy down for good. Don’t ask me. Bigger bang for your buck, I guess. I notice two more of the little pricks pop back up after I had just taken down the other two. They were starting to creep me out with that damn mantra. I couldn’t take it. Suddenly, I hear a screeching coming from down the street. “Stop shooting Cutey!” I yell at the top of my lungs. “…Gimme the scoop.” I say. She yells back, “Well baby, Riot down there is still entertaining hisself…” She stops for like a split second and then says exactly what I wanted her to say. “…but the calvary just arrived.”
Georgia Girl and B.A.
Vehicle: standard (rank 1)
And here comes that bad-ass pak-ba, Georgia Girl drifting around the corner in her 1983 GMC G-Series (G-15) Van. That. Van. Is. Bad. Ass. (B.A.) She’s wailing like a southern fried madwoman and cranking Freebird. I hate that song, but I love seeing her have fun. When that bad ass van straightens out, she pumps hard on the gas and wheels right into those replicating Risks. Thunk-a-thunk-a-thunk-a-thunk! Oh man, talk about great stuff. Let’s see you regenerate from that! Ha! Sok dee, loser. So after that the sirens are going crazy. I’m like, “dtum louat!” That’s police stupid. You always forgot that one and it was the most important one. Anyway, F’n cops don’t usually come to this side of town, but with the noise we were making up in that joint. Well, we figure it’s time to bail out. Georgia is already on it. The side doors pop open and all of us pop in, cigar face too. Because, it’s time to talk and you better believe we let him have it. Cutey and I are all in his face and even Georgia is giving him an ear full from the driver’s seat. You know why, ya loser, because we love our men. The fuck is wrong with you Tony! I hope it was worth it. He tells us how you turn on him. How you rat on the whole operation to them Angel pricks. He tells us how you sic Risk on em and then run off with that lousy floosy. Then…Bam! We are hit hard from the side and driven into a hydrant. Water’s spraying all over the place and Georgia’s pissed. She just waxed B.A. We get out ready to rumble as usual. But then they pop out too: at least a dozen S.U.V’s and two dozen guys to fill them. Not only that, but the sirens have stopped too. I look at the girls. If we are to die, at least we die hard.
That’s when cigar face calmly walks out of the van. This guy! He just waves his hand and all the guys put down there guns. “This is my calvary ladies.” He says while pulling out his Blackberry phone. “Let’s talk business.”
The rest is history Tony. You know the deal. He puts us on as the top dogs in the Bottom. He needs his little local hustle, ya know. He puts you on the list…and guess who gets to do the hitting. Such a F’n jerk. It’s been years and you haven’t even bothered to call. We were supposed to skip this town together. But that’s fine. I got a better deal. Stinky cigar face is doing alright by us ladies. Plus, the Brick showed up for his diamond. We told him that you skipped town with it. He’ll be seeing you soon if he hasn’t already. If you make it through that and something tells me you will; then you’ll be seeing us too. It’s been a long time, Tony baby.