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By UMPIRE

Ahsoka Tano vs. Taron Malicos

MATCH SCORE
Ahsoka Tano: 8
Taron Malicos: 1

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Shan Yu vs. Bill Cipher

MATCH SCORE
Shan Yu: 2
Bill Cipher: 8

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Abra Stone vs. Fortnite Island

MATCH SCORE
Abra Stone: 4
Fortnite Island: 6

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Richard O'Connell vs. Warworld

MATCH SCORE
Richard O'Connell: 5
Warworld: 7

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12:8 - The Star Wars Fanatics vs. The Foot Clan

MATCH SCORE
The Star Wars Fanatics: 4
The Foot Clan: 9

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Beta Ray Bill vs. Captain Marvel / Shazam

MATCH SCORE
Beta Ray Bill: 9
Captain Marvel / Shazam: 3

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12:8 - Trevor Belmont (Netflix) vs. Domino (Marvel Comics)

MATCH SCORE
Trevor Belmont: 4
Domino (Marvel Comics): 8

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Ashley J. Williams vs. Predator Pyramid

MATCH SCORE
Ashley J. Williams: 5
Predator Pyramid: 9

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Mr. Peanut vs. Wendy

MATCH SCORE
Mr. Peanut: 5
Wendy: 6

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Lt. Ellen Ripley vs. New York City Penitentiary

MATCH SCORE
Lt. Ellen Ripley: 14
New York City Penitentiary: 3

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Shocker vs. Rhino

MATCH SCORE
Shocker: 8
Rhino: 3

By UMPIRE

12:8 - The Mutants (The Dark Knight Returns) vs. Orcs

MATCH SCORE
The Mutants (The Dark Knight Returns): 3
Orcs: 9

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Bragi vs. Zeus

MATCH SCORE
Bragi: 6
Zeus: 3

By UMPIRE

12:8 - George Volcano vs. Ronald McDonald

MATCH SCORE
George Volcano: 4
Ronald McDonald: 5

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Angar the Screamer vs. Trapster

MATCH SCORE
Angar the Screamer: 9
Trapster: 2

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Magpie vs. King Shark

MATCH SCORE
Magpie: 3
King Shark: 9

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Ninjas vs. The 300 Spartans

MATCH SCORE
Ninjas: 6
The 300 Spartans: 7

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Thor vs. Anubis

MATCH SCORE
Thor: 7
Anubis: 2

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Apocalypse vs. Ultron

MATCH SCORE
Apocalypse: 10
Ultron: 0

By UMPIRE

12:8 - Doomsday vs. The Hulk

MATCH SCORE
Doomsday: 7
The Hulk: 5

All-Purpose Sports Thread


Stranglehold-prime
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For once, I feel no inclination to root for either team. Now that Germany is gone, there isn't anyone to root against either.

 

Ahhhh... I'll cheer for the Netherlands, even though I'm pretty sure Spain has this.

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Not enough money and not enough ball. Poor choice by LeBron. If he wasn't going to stay with the Cavs, who couldn't put a winning team together, then I think he should have gone to the Bulls. Would have worked out much better.

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Not enough money and not enough ball. Poor choice by LeBron. If he wasn't going to stay with the Cavs, who couldn't put a winning team together, then I think he should have gone to the Bulls. Would have worked out much better.

i think they will win .

but i still think the bulls would have been a better fit .

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Even though Bosh was great for us here in Toronto and I hold no animocity towards him (mostly because we don't care enough about bball up here), I'd still like to see the Heat suffer catastrophic failure next season.

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I hate basketball, but from what I hear, this is a somewhat bad choice by Lebron. The Heat, if they manage to sign Bosh, Wade, and Lebron, will have to sign every other player on the team at minimum salary cap or damn close to it. Then, the team might implode. You have 3 guys who are used to always having the ball and running the entire offense. The Bulls are still capable of being a better team. Boozer will be pretty good for the next few years and D-Rose is an absolute beast.

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I hate basketball, but from what I hear, this is a somewhat bad choice by Lebron. The Heat, if they manage to sign Bosh, Wade, and Lebron, will have to sign every other player on the team at minimum salary cap or damn close to it. Then, the team might implode. You have 3 guys who are used to always having the ball and running the entire offense..

 

Right, because a team with 3 big players and a bunch of minimum salary guys could NEVER win the championship...

 

celeb14.jpg

 

Wait a minute...

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Right, because a team with 3 big players and a bunch of minimum salary guys could NEVER win the championship...

 

celeb14.jpg

 

Wait a minute...

 

 

I'd bet money that Miami won't win. Boston got lucky with Rondo coming up big. I doubt anyone expected him to be the kind of star that he has become. Plus, Garnett knew how to be a team player. He didn't run the offense and think that "If I don't have the ball, we'll lose". Wade, Bosh, and LeBron have been used to being just about the only good player on their team.

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World Cup Final today. Even if you don't watch soccer, flip on the tv. 2:30 Eastern time. Help set new world record for humanity.

 

Note: Also, still rooting for Spain.

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I watched about 15 minutes of it while I was waiting for my lunch to cook. I saw about 6 or 7 dives during that time, including a spectacular double dive (minimal contact - dive - no call - retaliate with minimal contact - dive - call), no scoring and maybe two legitimate scoring chances - both of which sailed well over the crossbar. I saw Europeans whining like b*tches after every single play. I saw lots of kicking back and forth in midfield. The only exciting play I (almost) saw was halted prematurely by some weird offside call where the forward was like half a foot behind the two defenders when he took the pass. The lack of actual timekeeping was confusing and uneccessary.

 

In all, it reaffirmed everything I dislike about soccer.

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Come on, it was an epic match. Both sides were threatening to score. it nearly went into penalty kicks. In soccer, one should may more attention to the teams in general. Both wanted to leave their choking nature behind and did not want to be disappointed once more. Plus, Netherlands declared independence from Spain, making this match even more interesting. Congrats to Spain on their first ever World Cup victory.

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Come on, it was an epic match. Both sides were threatening to score. it nearly went into penalty kicks. In soccer, one should may more attention to the teams in general. Both wanted to leave their choking nature behind and did not want to be disappointed once more. Plus, Netherlands declared independence from Spain, making this match even more interesting. Congrats to Spain on their first ever World Cup victory.

 

There was absolutely nothing epic which occurred in the 15 minutes I watched, nor the brief snippets of soccer I've watched in the past. Here are things soccer could do to get me to watch:

 

1) MORE SCORING: For a game with gigantic nets, there sure isn't a ton of scoring. Yes yes yes I'm a heathen who should appreciate the subtleties of a 0-0 game and blah blah blah. Look, unless you already love soccer you want to see goals. The rest is really fairly boring, let's be honest - particularly to someone used to watching other sports. I love hockey, and even I was happy they changed the rules to promote scoring and reduce the neutral zone trap. Scoring is king in North America.

 

2) TIMEKEEPING: For Christ's sake could someone PLEASE use proper timekeeping. If the only person on or off the field who knows how much time is left is the referee - and he's pretty much ballparking it as he goes along - your sport is ridiculous. Have a set amount of time for a game. Allow stoppages. Hire a timekeeper so the ref can ref. Buy a f*cking scoreboard and let the rest of us in on it. It's not rocket science.

 

3) LESS DIVING: Diving is for pussies. It is rampant in your sport, and no one in America is going to take it seriously until you all man up, grow a pair and start playing like men.

 

4) FIGHTING/CONTACT: You need more of this, but I've been saying the same thing about baseball for years to no avail.

 

5) LESS WIERD EURO CHANTING: Seriously people. This might work in Europe but in North America, having a bunch of drunkards singing "Ole Ole Ole" for a few hours is grating and embarassing. We already make fun of the Montreal Canadiens for it, and they only pretend to be European. Just cheer, do the wave and mercilessly heckle like sports fans are supposed to.

 

6) BAN SCARVES: I don't know who started this tradition, but soccer scarves are a terrible idea. Let's take the most effeminate accessory we can find and make it a grand tradition. I'd forgive you if I saw more hooligans strangling people with them, but I've been disappointed there too. My suggestion: foam hats and/or fingers.

 

7) ADVERTISING ON SOCCER JERSEYS: Seriously weak. Have a team logo and paste in on the front, then put the players name and numbers on the back - just like everyone else. Why am I going to buy a TFC jersey with a little tiny TFC patch on the arm or chest and a big advertisement for the Bank of Montreal across the front? Every time I see this in European hockey I fume. Hey Europe - make money the old fashioned way: by milking your fans.

 

8) WEAK TROPHIES: What is with the tiny trophies? Every major soccer trophy I've seen is small. Here is Spain enjoying their World Cup:

 

spain-300x187.jpg

 

Look at it. It's barely the size of that little Spanish dude's forearm. Now, check out the Stanley Cup:

 

hayden-panettiere-stanley-cup-2.jpg

 

It's so big, the cheerleader from Heroes can barely hump it!

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so your problem with football is everything about it

BTW if your going to say North America please realize Mexico is part of North America and us Mexicans love ourselves some football

 

 

Yeah, because I'm sure political correctness was his main concern in that post.

 

 

Diving sucks. So does Iniesta. Go Persie.

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so your problem with football is everything about it

 

Pretty much, yeah.

 

BTW if your going to say North America please realize Mexico is part of North America and us Mexicans love ourselves some football

 

Next time, I will use "North North America" to avoid any confusion.

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Next time, I will use "North North America" to avoid any confusion.

I guess you could also say Non-Latin America...

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Well, Spain won, and the tournament ended, so I don't think this topic will see a lot of action, but I must reply to Sober. Why?

 

Mostly because he brings up good points which I've heard before, but never all at once. So, is football/soccer doomed to fail... And by fail, I mean aside from being the most popular sport in the world. I mean in North-North America....

 

 

1)  MORE SCORING:  For a game with gigantic nets, there sure isn't a ton of scoring.  Yes yes yes I'm a heathen who should appreciate the subtleties of a 0-0 game and blah blah blah.  Look, unless you already love soccer you want to see goals.  The rest is really fairly boring, let's be honest - particularly to someone used to watching other sports.  I love hockey, and even I was happy they changed the rules to promote scoring and reduce the neutral zone trap.  Scoring is king in North America.

 

Well, you said it yourself, you should accept that some games will be great yet end in 0-0. You just have to learn to appreciate the art of the sport (when a good offense meets a good defense great plays can happen without anyone scoring).

 

However, having said that, not all soccer games are awesome. There are boring soccer games, just like any other sport. 

 

Also, I will also admit that you have a point. Goals are exciting and the lack of them can be frustrating. This is why I am completely bored by baseball. However, wouldn't you prefer two sides clashing with one another in an attempt to get that really hard to get goal? Or would you rather make it really easy to score? 

 

If you did that then you'd get something like basketball. Each game is suppose to reach 100 points at least, something that has never happened in soccer. However, this doesn't make the sport better. Have you ever seen a basketball player run into the crowd and rip his shirt off? And have the fans go crazy while the commentators scream "GGGGOOOOLLLL!!!" for several minutes?

 

Of course not. Even when someone scores a three pointer (the maximum amount possible) everybody just runs back to the other side of the court and act like it doesn't matter (because a few seconds later someone else scores a three pointer). Heck, only the last few minutes of the game seem to matter.

 

Still, I see what you mean. Like I said, low scoring (and unbelievable amount of time) keeps me from enjoying baseball. 

 

Point: Soberguy & Hockey

 

2)  TIMEKEEPING:  For Christ's sake could someone PLEASE use proper timekeeping.  If the only person on or off the field who knows how much time is left is the referee - and he's pretty much ballparking it as he goes along - your sport is ridiculous.  Have a set amount of time for a game.  Allow stoppages.  Hire a timekeeper so the ref can ref.  Buy a f*cking scoreboard and let the rest of us in on it.  It's not rocket science.

 

Sober, what are you talking about? Games last two 45 minute halves, with extra time added on to adjust injuries, & other time wasting events. On a tv broadcast, the time is on the top left corner (with... Surprise! The score).

 

If you're watching the game at the stadium, there will be a scoreboard. I can also guarantee seats & crazed fans.

 

Point: Marvel Man & Soccer

 

Note: If Canada's tv broadcast does not include the time/score, I apologize. I have never watched a soccer game from Canada...

 

3)  LESS DIVING:  Diving is for pussies.  It is rampant in your sport, and no one in America is going to take it seriously until you all man up, grow a pair and start playing like men.

 

I direct you to an ESPN article about why the US Team will not be a world player until they dive more often. Included are several examples of US sports that have a type of dive:

 

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/world-cup/col...;cc=5901?ver=us

 

Also, not all fouls are dives. What type of fouls do you see in a World Cup final? How about a ninja kick to the chest?!

 

http://www.google.com/m/url?client=safari&...G2wKK2q7XNNwnUw

 

That guy kept on playing. Cause he's a man!

 

Point: Marvel Man & Soccer

 

4)  FIGHTING/CONTACT:  You need more of this, but I've been saying the same thing about baseball for years to no avail.  

 

What? If by contact you mean Hockey/Football's "wear a bulletproof vest, shoulder pads, and oven mitts" contact?

 

goalie_hockey_gear3.jpg

 

Seriously, are those leg pads? What, is he about to get run over by a truck or something? 

 

Anyways, having poked fun at that, I'll admit that things might get a bit more physical in other sports. Congrats, you guys get the brain damage & black eyes.

 

But honestly, shouldn't the fast, skill-dominated sport be better than one where the bigger guy can simply trample the little guy?

 

Meh, no point. Just a matter of taste.

 

5)  LESS WIERD EURO CHANTING:  Seriously people.  This might work in Europe but in North America, having a bunch of drunkards singing "Ole Ole Ole" for a few hours is grating and embarassing.  We already make fun of the Montreal Canadiens for it, and they only pretend to be European.  Just cheer, do the wave and mercilessly heckle like sports fans are supposed to.

 

Bah! Just watch non-European soccer for the wave. The Ole thing is to mock an opponent after an awesome play. Not sure how it was started. 

 

However, if you're saying soccer fans are wimps, I'll point you towards an English rivalry game. Those hooligans are crazy. Same goes for Argentinian fans. 

 

Heck, just go to a live soccer game to see the usual foul swearing & beer chugging. Just men being men. 

 

Point: Marvel Man & Soccer

 

6)  BAN SCARVES:  I don't know who started this tradition, but soccer scarves are a terrible idea.  Let's take the most effeminate accessory we can find and make it a grand tradition.  I'd forgive you if I saw more hooligans strangling people with them, but I've been disappointed there too.  My suggestion: foam hats and/or fingers.

 

I'm not going to defend the scarves. However, in soccer's defense, actual fans ditch the scarves and go crazy with the costumes:

 

206fan8_gallery__470x322.jpg

brazilian-soccer-fan.jpg

canadian_fans.jpg

 

Also, chicks look good in scarves/body paint: (Yes, it's in Spanish)

 

 

Point: Soberguy & Hockey

 

7)  ADVERTISING ON SOCCER JERSEYS:  Seriously weak.  Have a team logo and paste in on the front, then put the players name and numbers on the back - just like everyone else.  Why am I going to buy a TFC jersey with a little tiny TFC patch on the arm or chest and a big advertisement for the Bank of Montreal across the front?  Every time I see this in European hockey I fume.  Hey Europe - make money the old fashioned way:  by milking your fans.

 

Meh. Considering that the games aren't plagued by American Football's constant commercial breaks, or NASCAR's full bodied advertisement suits, I'm not complaining. Still, I see your point.... It's not even limited to sport brands, since several of my beloved teams will proudly wear coca-cola logos alongside banks?

 

Point: Soberguy & Hockey

 

8)  WEAK TROPHIES:  What is with the tiny trophies?  Every major soccer trophy I've seen is small.  Here is Spain enjoying their World Cup:

 

spain-300x187.jpg

 

Look at it.  It's barely the size of that little Spanish dude's forearm.  Now, check out the Stanley Cup:

 

hayden-panettiere-stanley-cup-2.jpg

 

It's so big, the cheerleader from Heroes can barely hump it!

 

Haha. I see... Well, the Nobel Peace prize is far smaller. So are Olympic medals. Does size matter that much?

 

Unless by size, you mean money. In which case the Spanish team can easily buy any of the NHL teams with their outrageously large salaries...

 

Anyways, Stanley Cup loses points for allowing the chick from heroes to hump it. The World Cup trophy can only be touched by people who've won it, or heads of state. It's said that anyone else who touches it is vaporized from it's greatness. 

 

Hockey can get the chick from heroes (has she been in anything else?), soccer gets Nelson Mandela:

 

nelson-mandela-world-cup.jpg

 

Semi-Hot actress < World Leader

 

Also, doesn't an international tournament outrank a national tournament? I'd much rather cheer on the USA against England than English speaking Canada against French speaking Canada...

 

Meh, no point here. 

 

So, I guess it's tied 3-3. Will soccer gain momentum in Canada?! We will find out...

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