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Boratz

Match 15531 Santa Claus vs. Dick Dastardly

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Oh, the weather outside is frightful
 
Less than a week until the big day, the elves were running frantic to get the toys ready. The reindeer were preparing themselves yet for another flight around the entire world all in one night! It is enough to stress out just about any normal person, but Old Saint Nick is no normal man. He made his list, he checked it twice, and is as jolly as ever! Walking past the elves, he glowed with powerful jolly good joy that inspired the elves to be as confident as ever! The Big Day of Christmas was fast approaching and the North Pole was crazy as all get out! Notty or nice, would mean nothing if everything failed on that one Big Night! While Santa prepared his list and checked it twice, there is one thing he did not see coming. There was a dastardly plot that was being hatched for this very Christmas!
 
************************
 
The North Pole
 
While surveying the elves, Santa was walking alongside the head elf, Benard. While most elves were filled with joy and an optimistic spirit, Benard was almost the opposite. Meeting deadlines were his highest priority, and usually his pessimism turned off his fellow elves. While Santa had a jolly smile walking amongst the elves, Benard had his face down while he was looking over reports. As he followed closely behind Santa he spoke of his worries about the Big Day!
 
"The numbers are in, Santa! There are just too many problems!" Benard pleaded as he followed Santa.
 
"Oh Benny, there's problems every year and every year we have a wonderful Christmas!" Santa said with a jolly smile.
 
"Please Santa, I've told you for centuries now that I don't like being called Benny. My name is Benard! And this year is different!" Benard replied as he stopped for a moment.
 
"That is what you say every year! That's what you said when we had that year with the foggy Christmas Eve! Do you remember what happened then?" Santa asked as he stopped with a smirk.
 
"Of course I remember, Santa. Rudolph even got a hit song and respect from all the other reindeer!" Benard said with a sigh.
 
"Or that time that I crashed my sleigh in Central Park! I remember getting an ear full from you on that one! Can you remind me what happened then?" Santa quipped.
 
"Buddy helped you get your sleigh running again with Christmas cheer, bu...." Benard replied before being interrupted.
 
"The same Buddy that you were afraid would ruin this place since he was a human in an elf's world. How many times have we had problems and everything is more than good in the end?" Santa asked with his large smile.
 
"How about that incident in Whoville? Or even that Pumpkin King guy from Halloween Town? I'm pretty sure you've gotten arrested before too?" Benard replied with a look of frustration.
 
"And they all worked out in the end! Whoville became even more jolly than before. That ol' Grinch's heart grew larger because of it, and now he is loved by all the town! Jack is doing well in Halloween Town! And that miracle on 34th Street changed many lives that day!" Santa responded as he reached into his pocket.
 
"They were all close calls! Eventually one of these is going to be too close and we lose everything!" Benard said with a worried look.
 
Pulling a cookie out of his pocket. Santa took a bite and looked at his head elf for a moment. "I remember when those 3 children got lost on the Polar Express. You said that it a close call then too! Those kids' lives changed forever! Whether it was trusting others or simply believing! Benard, there is always going to be close calls... I need you to trust and believe!" Santa said with a warm smile.
 
"Of course, Santa. You know me... I just get worried!" Benard said with a half smile.
 
"That is why you are my head elf! You know what needs to be done and I thank you for that!" Santa replied as he finished off his cookie. 
 
Deep in another part of the world...
 
With a twist of his mustache, the wicked and cruel Dick Dastardly let out a heinous laugh as he looked over his latest mischevious plans! Muttley stood by his side also letting out an evil laugh! Dastardly turned to his dog with a huge and wicked grin! Muttley got up in the table and looked over the blue prints for their plan!
 
"This Christmas, we are going to steal Santa's sleigh and his precious reindeer! We will be faster than anything, Muttley!" Dastardy yelled while throwing out his arms.  "Come Muttley, we are going to the North Pole!" Dick Dastardly and Muttley loaded in a rocket type air craft. As the ship lifted off the ground, Muttley let out a giggle as a bird flew into Dastardly's face! "DRAT!" Dastardly yelled as spit out a feather. The rocket launched into the clouds and soared through the skies!
 
The North Pole
 
The wicked duo landed near the North Pole! After sneaking into the land, they kept themselves hidden from elves and other magical creatures. As they crept passed Santa's workshop, they saw it up ahead! A luxurious massive building that was the stables for the reindeer and where the legendary sleigh was kept! Dick Dastardly twisted his mustache as a wicked grin formed across his face! "This is it, Muttley!" 
 
The two snuck into the stables and they saw the sleigh in the center of a large room! Lights shined down upon the legendary sleigh! Dastardly crept over to the sleigh and rubbed his hands across the shiney red siding! "Beautiful!" Dastardly said as he took out some of his equipment. Dastardly glanced over at his companion!
 
"Now to get those reindeer!" Dastardly said as he gazed upon Muttley.
 
Muttley let out a giggle as they roamed through the stables. After using a device to lure the reindeer into the sleigh room, Dick Dastardly captured the reindeer and attached them to Santa's sleigh.
 
"Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen! Well that's eight, where's the last one!" Dastardly said as he looked around the stables. In a dark corner of the stables, he saw a red glow shining bright! "And Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer! That's nine! Muttley, do something!"
 
Muttley was able to capture Rudolph and had him strapped in the front of the other reindeer. Everything was going according to plan! Until... Benard the Head Elf walked into the stables to do a check on the sleigh and Santa's reindeer!
 
"OH MY!" Benard gasped!
 
"Drat, and double drat!" Dastardly yelled as frustration engulfed his face. "Muttley, do something and get that elf!" 
 
Muttley charged at the Head Elf and captured poor Benard. Dastardly loaded the Head Elf into the back of Santa's sleigh!
 
"You can't do this! You'll ruin Christmas!" Benard pleaded.
 
"I don't care! I have other plans!" Dastardly responded as he mushed forward with the reindeer and with that the sleigh took off out of the North Pole.
 
After seeing the Reindeer leaving, the elves started to panic. Mrs. Claus ran out to see the commotion and heard one of the elves saying that Santa's sleigh and all the reindeer had been stolen! Mrs. Claus pushed an alarm and Santa quickly made his way to the front of the workshop!
 
"Your sleigh and the reindeer, they were STOLEN! And poor Benard was kidnapped!" Mrs. Claus exclaimed as she watched her husband grow worried.
 
"I will do what I can to save my friend, to rescue my reindeer, and to get back my sleigh!" Santa replied as he tightened his gloves!
 

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12 minutes ago, patrickthekid said:

What happened here? Did you post it by accident?

Its up now

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Hope you all enjoy

I know Christmas is a couple days away but Merry Christmas to you all and hope you all have a good New Years

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Great festive setup, 5 star, and I feel for Benard! His blood pressure must be off the scale with stress 😆.

I think Santa will somehow pull this out of the bag (sack), with some ingenious race happening in the middle of it all and Dastardly maybe even learning something about the spirit of Christmas!

On that note,  have a great Christmas and New Year!

 

 

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Love the Christmas theme. I barely remember Dastardly so nice choice of character. Written well too.

Santa wins here, as he's got that holly jolly magic up his sleeve.

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Very nice, Boratz! You've been using exclamations a lot in your set-ups lately, but still a very good story. 

From what I remember about Dick Dastardly and Muttely, they're no more competent than the rest of the comedic Hanna-Barbera villains. Add to the fact that Santa never loses as far as Christmas is concerned, and the Jolly Old Elf should have this. 

BTW, Boratz, since you have a team in the Fantasy Draft, you might want to jump in and start standing up for picks. Your team isn't doing so well, I'm afraid.

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For some reason I remembered the name Bernard from the Santa Clause movie and wondered if you were doing something in that universe before I realized its an extended Santa Universe. Nicely done. I have no faith in Dick Dastardly as a competent villain so Santa gets the vote.

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Match Final Results

RATINGS SCORE: 4.25
0 regular members rated the match.
4 CBUB Match Judges rated the match.

MATCH SCORE
Santa Claus: 7
Dick Dastardly: 0

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