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KibaxHinata

Match 13790 Jiang Shi vs. Stan Lee

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APRIL CHALLENGE: STAN LEE COMICS # 1

 

ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: MAY 1962

 

 

  WELCOME TRUE BELIEVERS, TO STAN LEE COMICS # 1. A WORLD OF THE UBERMENSCH: STAN LEE AND HIS FRIEND; JACK KIRBY. WE MEET OUR HEROES AT THEIR JOB CREATING COMICS FOR THE MASSES.

 

 Stan and Kirby had finally completed their latest work: the monstrous beast known as: The Incredible Hulk. Just one of their many works. “See you again tomorrow Kirby.†Stan stated, filing the work. Kirby nodded and left. In this world; Stan was more than a man, he was an Ubermensch. He was capable of superhuman speed, flight, spider-like senses, and the ability to wield light in the palm of his hands.

 

 He could remember the past; during World War II; he was captured by Scientists from Romania. They were a rogue fraction trying to create superhuman monsters. Among them was Stan himself. He escaped, barely harmed. The man became a writer and constructed his powers into the forms of fictional characters. Only his wife and closest friends could understand and know about this.

 

 Fortunately, nobody seemed to know about this. However, this was only in America. On the other side of the world; a man, a former Romanian scientist named Alexandru Dogaru; was studying the comics Stan created.

 

-ROMANIAN CASTLE. THE FORMER CASTLE OF VLAD THE IMPALER-

 

“Well now, Mr. Lee, you found a way to hide your identity as an Ubermensch. A shame you won’t be able to hide the secret for much longer.†He chuckled.

 

A Chinese man stood behind him, chanting in Cantonese.

 

“Mr. Khan. These ‘Ji- ang- she’ of yours; are they worth the money I put into hiring you?â€

The man didn’t respond. He was still chanting. Eventually, he clapped his hands, revealing an entire city worth of Jiang-shi waiting for them.

 

“The pinnacle of magic and science combined. Why did you wish for this, Dogaru?â€

 

“I want to destroy my creation: Stan Lee. If people wise up; they’d see the truth. His inspirational writing will eventually make people learn about the Ubermensch. No matter whom basterdized his works, he will eventually show people the truth about the science we did. He will save the world instead of conquer it like I wished.â€

 

Khan rubbed his chin, confused.

 

“Why would you need an army? Why not hire an assassin?â€

 

“He is not human anymore… Stan Lee is above human measure. His senses, everything about him is on another level. Human weapons would never kill him easily. That’s why, I need the Jiang-shi, to eat. His. Soul.â€

 

 

~~New York. A week later~~

 

Stan was enjoying a hot dog at the county fair. While watching a child play with her new balloon, he could only smile. However, his hearing would prove useful as he heard an unfamiliar hiss behind him.

 

“Lee…â€

 

Stan turned and saw a strange man in ancient Chinese garb.

 

“Ah, hello good sir.†Stan offered, enjoying the rest of his food.

 

The man didn’t respond in a human way. Instead he arched his arms out and hissed again. He than arched onto his toes and hopped towards him. Stan knew that this wasn’t a good time to laugh, but he couldn’t resist. The idea that some man was trying to kill him while hopping was too comical to take seriously. While laughing, the man wrapped his hands at Lee’s neck and opened his mouth. Unconcerned, Stan managed to slip through the man’s fingers and kick him across the ground, rendering him unconscious. Stan knew such a display should’ve attracted attention so with that in mind; he held his breath and became invisible. Thankfully; everybody was none the wiser.

 

 Upon arriving home; Stan decided to study up his monster guide. He called a few friends but none of them seemed to know what attacked him. Eventually; he decided to write it out in the Bullpen Bulletins. The response was surprisingly fast. One comic fan from Idaho explained everything.

 

 â€œA Jiang shi. Never heard of it; but according to our friend, it is a Chinese monster that eats life energy. These things are known to come out at night and only hop because of rigor mortis.†Jack stated, reading the response while drawing one of the poses Stan wanted.

 

 â€œAn interesting choice of enemy, but what I want to know, is why me?†he pondered, holding his arm out with his hand open. Jack shrugged. “I don’t know. But even you have enemies. Remember what you told me from the war?â€

 

 Stan laughed; “Maybe that’s where it was from. Good old Mr. Dogaru hasn’t gave up on me.â€

 

 Jack looked back at him. “Stan, take this seriously. We have a Romanian scientist who wants you dead. If your comics are right, he may go for your family.â€

 

 Stan looked back at Jack with a reassuring smile. “He’d have to get past me first. Come on Kirby, you, your wife, and my family are going to Romania.â€

 

 Jack didn’t like the sound of it. Their families didn’t have combat experience, and he surely didn’t want to get Roz into any problems.

 

 Like a cliché; the second Stan opened the door to leave the room; he saw an entire hallway filled with Jiang-shi. Laughing, Stan backed up and prepared to fight. “Jack, I'll let you know when its safe; now say it with me!†he requested. Jack groaned and went along with Stan. The writer smirked as he looked down the hallway, preparing to utter his catchphrase.

 

GET READY TRUE BELIEVERS, FOR THE START OF THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR! CAN STAN FIGHT HIS WAY ACROSS THIS HALL OF MONSTERS !? FIND OUT NEXT TIME, IN STAN LEE COMICS!

 

“EXCELSIOR!â€

 

 

Match Rules

-Stan knows what the Jiang-shi can do.

 

-Stan’s powers (for this universe) are Spider-Man’s spider senses, Hulk’s strength (on par with the Hulk’s first appearance), Thor’s lightning conjuring, the ability to turn invisible, optic blasts of three feet, and the speed of Quicksilver.

 

-The fight is to clear the entire hallway from 520 Jiang-shi.

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Interesting Challenge entry, Kibax. Nice way of invoking Stan Lee, the pop culture figure. 

 

As for the match, with the powers he has, Stan should win this easily. He should easily be stronger, faster, and quicker than this entire group of Jiang Shi, and in the off-chance the Jiang Shi manage to get in position to crowd Lee, he can become invisible and sneak into better position to take them out.

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Chinese vampire vs comicbook writer?...

 

F*CKIN AAAAAAAAWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Heh nice and enjoyable setup. Stan with the powers he has can take it.

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