Doctor Victor Von Doom: perhaps the most brilliant and ruthless conquerer to ever walk among the insects known as Man.
Bruce Wayne - The Batman: perhaps the greatest detective and defender ever to guard the weak and helpless.
We've challenged Dr. Doom to completely take over Gotham City and challenged Batman to keep him out. At the end, the city can only belong to one.
These two amazing contenders will face off in a total contest of intelligence, power and will. This is not your average one-shot fight confrontation, today... this is the real deal.
A complete twelve issue limited series of a confrontation - epic in scope - which will see Bruce Wayne and von Doom trading conversation on the floor of a state dinner to trading blows in the dark streets of Gotham.
Neither will quit until the other is vanquished completely.
Join us now in a battle we had to call...
Cult of Personality
This fight suggested by: J.Law
THE SPORTS BOX
Callisto: Welcome to another edition of the CBUB! Yes, in this edition, Dr. Doom takes on the Batman in our own Super Dating Game II!
Harley Quinn: ah, come on. Don't tease the viewers, here. She's just joking, folks.
Callisto: Oh, all right. Just a little joke. Some of you may remember that we forced poor Victor Von Doom to play the Dating Game last time he was here in the now legendary bachelor battle Dr. Doom vs. Magneto - The Battle for Harley's Love.
Harley Quinn: Yeah... Swoon. A guy with a bucket on his head vs. one with a hunk of steel welded to his face. Who was a young an impressionable lass like myself to choose?
Callisto: So as I recall you spent some special ... quality time with Dr. Doom during that match. What can you tell us about him given your ... um... special insight?
Harley Quinn: Well, it turns out, in the end, it was just a Doom-Bot I spent all that time with.
Callisto: For real?
Harley Quinn: Yup. I called him "Doomie" and what we shared together was like...
Callisto: Anthony and Cleopatra?
Harley Quinn: ...Um, sort'a. But with a stainless steel aftertaste. Anyways, I must say, those DoomBots are very well made - right down to the last detail. And they're built to last, if yaknowwhatImean.
Callisto: Right. So, you're also a native of Gotham and you have quite a history with Batman. How do you feel the Bat stacks up against Doom?
Harley Quinn: Um.. I dunno. I have a lot of respect for the Bat, but...
Callisto: yes, what?
Harley Quinn: ...well, I don't think Batman could last as long as Doomie.
Callisto: Um... So..um... he couldn't last as long, then?
Harley Quinn: No. I don't think so.
Callisto: Well, there you have it - one woman's opinion. Let's see what you had to say.
The mailbag overflowed this match.
We've selected a few choice opinions, below. To see the whole edition of Flaming Arrows for this fight, Clicky Here.
The Red Fear Writes:
Well first off, Dr. Doom has already taken a victory in CBUB against the ONE AND ONLY man in the entire DC Universe who MIGHT have stood a chance against him. Lex Luthor. Doom is a villain capable of taking on the entire League(Much like Lex). And much like Lex, this is a contest Batman can't win without alot of help.
The ONLY way Bruce is taking a win here is if Lex decides to get some payback by lending him a hand at the last minute, or Batman calls on the collective resources of the ENTIRE Justice League, AND Oracle, AND his various sidekick underlings. Don't get me wrong, I like Bruce way more than Victor, but....
Toys: Everything Batman considers to be "cutting edge", Doom already threw away as obsolete years ago. The Batcave's probably full of Doom's hand-me-downs
Magic: Doom has it in droves. Batman doesn't. At best Batman knows a few people who MIGHT be able to help him counter Doom's magical might.
Direct Combat: Doom's suit is powerful enough to let him go one on one with any member of the JLA for at least a little while. While batman is without a doubt the superior fighter, the best Mouse in the world hasn't got a chance against the weakest elephant. And Doom is far from weak even without his armor. Batman's got NOTHING that's getting through Doom's armor, and as for his own suits he periodically uses, look at the toys section above.
Intelligance: Batman's smart. Doom's smarter. Much, much, much smarter. Kinda like somebody saying "Spiderman's Strong, but Superman's stronger". Batman's intellect doesn't even begin to rival Doom's.
Strategic Cunning: Here's where the two balance each other out. Without a doubt despite his inferior resources and manpower, Batman will make Doom work his ass off for a win. But Doom's superior resources, superior intellect, and superior manpower(An army of Doombots, villains-for-hire, summoned demons and more) ensure that his inevitable win is not in question. Speaking of which....
Manpower: Doom can call on a near endless supply of Robots, Demons, mutated freaks, time-displaced Dinosaurs, and bankroll damn near any other heavy-hitter villain you care to mention from EITHER of the two universes. All Bruce has to call on is the JLA, and other talented, but ultimately, mere human crimefighters like himself...none of whom are as capable of facing Doom intelectually as Bruce himself almost is(With possible exception of Oracle. And even then, she, like Bruce, is only ALMOST Doom's equal)
And the final bit of proof Batman can't take Doom. BANE already beat Batman on his OWN TURF. Bane. The frikkin' steroid abusing veiny freak. Bane outmaneuvered, outstrategized, and BROKE the Batman. In Gotham, in Batman's yard. BANE did this people. If you seriously think Doom can't meet and beat any intelectual, strategic, or physical feat of Bane, you're out of your gourd.
Only votes Batman's getting here are the Popularity(AKA, Anti-Marvel), and Ignorance votes. Sadly, those two categories make for ALOT of votes.
El Kabong Writes:
Now, THIS is freakin' scary. There is a very thin line between the two combatants in the match. Some things go one way, Doom ends up like Batman, some things go the other, Batman is Doom. But what's important in this battle is the fact that Doom and Batman think alike. Cold, calculating, ready for anything. Both of these men, if possible, will do as much research and reconnaissance on the other as possible. So, my dear pontificators, where does the advantage lie, the tortued Latverian in the iron mask, or the Dark Knight whom feels the need to dress up as a millionare playboy in the meantime?
Offense: Doom has lasers. Doom has spaceships. Doom has every weapon of mass destruction ever invented and probably some that haven't been locked in his basement. His very attire can destroy even the strongest of men. Batman, well, he has some contraptions in that utility belt that might neutralize some of Doom's firepower, but the problem is that as he does, Doom is going to be whipping out yet another death ray from under his cloak. Batman is also a master of nearly every martial arts, as I understand it, and he very well probably has something in that repertoire of moves to counteract a dictator in power armor. Still, point for Doom, thanks to his higher level of technology.
Defense: Doom is defined by his defenses. His armor defines his very villainy. Doom has enough countermeasures in that thing to neutralize nearly everything that Batman can throw at him. Batman, for his part, could very well be his equal, but for a different reason: while his suit is about as armored as he can make it, he's also got all that martial arts training to help him get out of the way. He can't match up to all the bells and whistles on Doom's armor, though. Point again for Doom.
Tactics: Doom has lasers. Doom has spaceships. Doom has all those WoMDs. Doom has that spiffy armor. But it does not matter in the least because Batman will more than likely know how to counteract each one. Given the chance, Batman will know every single chink in Doom's armor and weapons (I also think it likely that Batman will do enough research to distinguish Doombot from the real article, so that advantage will be neutralized)....and the thing that will likely decide the fight is Batman's ability to get under Doom's skin. Taunt him about his mother. His face. His inability to defeat Reed Richards. Any and all of Doom's failures. Doom has an ego the size of Jupiter and when Bats starts poking holes in it things are gonna start looking grim for Doom's chances of victory. Doom is no slouch in the tactics department as well, but someone as reclusive and shadowy as Batman will be difficult to obtain recon on. However, if Doom manages to discover Batman's true identity, then he's suddenly got massive leverage against his opponent. I find it unlikely that even Doom could pull this off, though (but if does, and he loses the fight...well...bye, bye Stately Wayne Manor, and probably a good bit of Gotham City as well). Point for Batman.
X Factor- God, this one is difficult to decide. Batman's planning could very well negate Doom's armor and weaponry. But, sadly, the fact of the matter remains: this is the absolute dictator of a country with power to spare versus a brooding rich boy who dresses up like a bat and jumps around on rooftops because he can't get over his parents' death. Doom simply has too many stops to pull out on Batman (I haven't even mentioned that mind swap thing, or the entire planet Doom has at his disposal, or the time machine), and sooner or later Batman will either drop, or more likely, admit defeat (not out loud, of course) and make a discreet exit.
Of course, considering Gotham's at stake here, he won't stay out for long: he'll be back with the power of the Justice League of frickin' America behind him, but then, that's another fight for another day.
Doom wins the day.
Big Poppa Pump Writes:
If my fellow Steroid-abusing asccociate BANE can figure out Batman's identity, you better beleive Doom will do it in a fraction of the time. Heck, one of his Doombots will do it for him while Doom himself enjoys some sweet tentacle Hentai. Which of course will give him an abundance of inspiration on what kind of nightmare creature he should summon up with his dark sorcery to deal with Batgirl.
If this were an equal Chess game, these two men would play for years with never a clear winner determined. But it's not. This is a chess game where batman has normal layout of peices, but Doom has traded in all his Pawns for extra Queens.
Heck, half the people who are voting for Batman as winner are doing so only after throwing in the stipulation he'd have to call on the JLA for support, meaning even you Batman fans know Brucie can't do it on his own. 'nuff said.
To my Freaks, and my Peaks.
HOLLA, IF YOU HEAR ME!!!
Paul Soth Writes:
Many good points have been made, but some things have to be taken into account. For instance, there is no time limit. In the various elsewords books and the like that show a world taken over by villains or rouge heroes, Batman is always shown leading up the resistance. Hence, even if Doom makes a grand sweep of the city, Batman will take months, or even years to take Doom down.
Second, while Doom's intellect and will are second to none, his hubris will take him down in the end. Batman is smart enough to take advantage of this, and he will work it out into a master plan. Keep in mind that Batman has battled some of the most brilliant and deranged minds in comics, and has won. He will play on that, that's a given, which in turn goes into another point... Batman will keep his head longer then Doom, who is quite easy to set off. Some might say that Doom will in turn try to play mind games on Batman, but it won't work. Batman will see the threat that Doom possesses, and will take him down, no matter what. Just as long as others don't get involved.
This is perhaps one of the most evenly matched fights ever presented, and it's hard to pick a clear winner... but I feel that Batman just edges out Doom in determination.
If we asume this is a GOOD written elseworld, by Alan Moore or Grant Morrison or something, we can exclude the rule that the bad guy must lose.
The most interesting outcome, to read as a comic anyway, would be something by this:
In the two first issues, Dr Doom begins his moves and some really slow storydevolpment begins. Of course he will meet the playboy Bruce Wayne sometimes and some heroes will be killed (I personaly would have hoped for the FF).
By the third issue, it would be time for a real confrontation, and Batman would be utterly humiliated. Maybe get his back broken, again. But he will survive.
Batman will then understand that Dr Doom is to big for him, at the moment, and will begin to devolp a new strategy in the dark, doing what he should have done a long time ago: Stop playing with bondesque toys and start collecting all the advanced science that just lies and collects dust all over the dc-universe.
Up to issue 8, he will actually begin to resemble Doom more. Getting his own army, sending his superpowered minions (JLA), and getting more and more advanced science.
But Dr Doom is still more experienced, so Batman will begin to lose againg. He will send more heroes (both from DC and Marvel) to their deaths at Dooms hand, and even begin to manipulate and recruit all the villains from DCU.
By Issue 11, Batman is good as a duplicate of Doom. He will understand what he have become, and will see what Doom is. Batman surrendes and bow before Doom. Doom accepts, he was finally found a whorthy heir.
Issue 12 will be an epilogue. Several years have passed. Dr Doom is now controlling Gotham, or maybe the whole world with an iron fist. Crime is no longer existing. Neither is freedom. He goes to his private chambers and removes his mask to look at the mirror. Beneath the mask, we see Bruce Wayne. Dr Doom has been dead for several years, assasinated by the man earlier known as Batman.
That was what would have happened with a good writer. Probably, we will just get some stupid explanation why Doom lost... again ("Damn! Me, Dr Doom, forgot the batteries to my suit. It's now vunerable to batarangs. Damn thee, my memory... wait... did I, Dr Doom, say that about vulnerable to batarangs loud?") and Batman will be home eating applepie before noon.
I love Batman. Love him to death. Big fan of Robin, Nightwing and Catwoman too. He's Batman, the guy who makes gods shift around nervously in his presense, the one man who can smack around any superhuman (up to and including Superman -- constantly) any time he jolly well feels like it. He's the guy who's ten steps ahead of everybody else, and while he waits for you to catch up, he's even further ahead. In short, Batman is not a badass, Batman is *the* badass, and in the DCU, IMHO, he is Mr Badass.
Which is why this match pains me. Because this is a horrible, horrible mismatch of galactic proportions.
Doom is Doom. Insane intelligence and insane levels of skill in both technology and magic, and given preptime, Doom is unbeatable. Give him a tube of lipstick and an onion, and in half an hour he'll have something that can kill Galactus.
Batman is king of preptime, but even if he raids the Watchtower (which I think he'll need to, going into battle against Doom), Doom is just that much more uber in about five or six fields, and Batman just isn't as good.
Doom, after all, is an evil-Batman with no self-control. Bats is the best in his particular universe, and it's just a damn shame that Doom isn't from Bruce's hometown.
So, I'll be in the corner watching Batman smack down Superman and waiting for this battle to end. Somebody call me next week...
Reluctantly, I must give this one to Dr. Doom.Im not really a Doom fan, But after careful analysis I give it to him for one reason, Magic. Doom is a master of martial arts, technology AND magic. Martial arts and tech. Batman can defeat, he has more than once. But magic? Ah, thats a different story. Batman is grounded in the physical world. Logic and fighting skills arent enough this time around. All of his foes are physical, and logical But Doom would be operating on a completely different level. If we're assuming that neither one is calling in any allies, than I think after a long, nasty fight, Batman would go down. But Doom wouldnt be completely unscathed and would probably say that The Batman was the greatest foe he'd ever faced. If, however, Batman gets to call on his JLA friends I think they could all take him together. If the Avengers can defeat him, they can. They have more heavy-hitters on their team. But that's if Batman would actually call them. He's proven again and again that he's a loner and relunctant to call on anyone else for assistance.
I... is this a dream? Do my eyes decieve me with some vision or trickery? CBUB is back? Pardon me a moment while I JOYGASM!!!
And I return to find Doom suffering from delusions of grandure. Going up against Batman?!? Let's break this down:
- Dr. Doom's main adversary is Reed Richards. A scientist. As Homer Simpson so eloquently put it, "Batman's a scientist!" Not looking good for Doom there. Doom is also lacking a key weapon here...
- No Baxter Building to launch into space.
- Batman cheats to win.
- Batman CHEATS to win. He has no qualms about re-writing a man's nervous system to mirror Dr. Stephen Hawking and then knocking him out.
"Welcome to Latvia... a Wayne Enterprises Community."
On the Rumbles board, I am a long-time Batman fan. I have defended Batman vs. many comers. I have nothing but the utmost respect for Bruce Wayne's almost peerless willpower, deviousness, and abilities.
With all that down, all of you Bat-Fanboys on this thread are talking like you're completely nucking futz.
Folks, this is Doom we are talking about here. Where Batman has a Batplane, Doom has dimensional exploration vehicles and spacecraft. Where Batman has cruise missiles, Doom has lightspeed anti-matter strategic bombardment systems capable of vaporizing entire cities in a millisecond. Where Batman has the world's best-stocked utility belt, Doom has a suit of personal armor that can throw down with Iron Man and a forcefield that can take a shot from Galactus and still leave the occupant un-vaporized.
Batman can terrorize any remotely sane person. Doom scares the crap out of /other megalomaniacs/. People who will laugh mockingly at the idea of facing Reed Richards in a battle of wits will turn pale and piss their pants at the mere /thought/ of crossing Doom, as those of us who remember the highly amusing FANTASTIC FOUR #29 (v3) will recall.
Doom is the only supervillain known to have conquered the planet Earth *three times*, *in continuity*, and *given it back*. He's scored clean wins over his arch-nemesis. He's made the primary heroic opponents of him have to bow down and acknowledge that without his aid, their children would have died.
He is the Greatest Supervillain Ever, and not even the Batman can bring him down.
For he is Doom, and Doom yields to no one.
(Note -- the author of this post, thanks to vigorous neuralyzer abuse, has forgotten everything written with Doom in it from "Unthinkable" onward. This was a necessary protective measure to save the author's sanity.)
Doctor Doom will win.
In the JLA, Batman was the brains of the team, which is a lot like being the tough guy in the Erasure fan club. His retarded science lessons made us fail more classes in grade school than modeling glue and fetal alcohol syndrome put together.It's not like it was his completely his fault though -- he didn't really need his brain after he got his Bat Computer. If someone give him a problem, a riddle, or if he just wanted to tell the future, he would feed crap into its slot. Not necessarily clues most times-- things like sandwiches, vacation pictures, stuff he found in his nose, and eventually the machine would spit out an answer on a long paper receipt. (Which was only for show, it always read it outloud for him anyway.)
The one thing that was really notable about Batman was the 5 toolsheds he had somehow jammed into his Utility Belt. I've seen him pull out bugspray, boomerangs, inflatable batrafts, 80 feet of batrope, and if Robin was lucky, tiny bat nipple clips. Batman could fall asleep and his belt would keep fighting crime. There were so many knobs and switches on it that he set off car alarms every time he let his gut hang loose. If you needed something bat-shaped and stupid, he probably had it in there somewhere. It was amazing. My cable guy only had a couple pliers and some wire on his belt, and it still yanked his pants down to his knees every time he moved.
Batman did the best he could as a superhero, but there's only so much you can do with no powers and a bunch of toys.If the Justice League of America was fighting an army ofd robots, Superman would melt hundreds by looking at them. They always had to save one for Batman, though, who would spend five minutes working out a complicated pulley system with his batropes to tie one up, and hope it breaks when he bonks it gently into a wall. Thanks, Batman, we couldn't have done it without you. I guess it's better than Aquaman who usually fought robots by sticking his head in the nearest sink and pretending to be soap. I know that seems weird, but robots are pretty easy to trick.
He's basically as clumsy, stupid and inept as everyone else on the team, but doesn't have any powers to help you forget. I think that's why he hangs out with Robin. Because when you're standing next to a little masked boy in his underwear, the last thing people are going to mention is how you're useless in a fight.
know the ice skates that pop out of the bottom of his shoes are great, and I swear to Christ he once shot Bat Lube out of his leg, but some of the things he had were insane. There was a button on the Batjet that makes it travel through time and space. And knowing Batman, he had the same option installed on all his Bat-Vehicles and didn't label one single button. It's just a matter of time before he accidentally bumps a switch on the Bat-Go Kart and sends himself into deep space 20 years ago without a helmet.
In short:Batman sucks,Doom rules.
While it is theoretically possible for Batman to win this match under optimal conditions (optimal conditions being defined as Bruce planning and counting on an outright divine intervention to weight the odds in his favor), men of reason and intelligence understand that the probability of Bruce scoring a credible victory in this match are roughly akin to the odds of Osama bin Laden undergoing a spontaneous conversion to Judaism on a CNN live broadcast.
To see the whole edition of Flaming Arrows for this fight, Clicky Here.
Callisto: And we are LIVE on the field for this spectacular match! I am you Fight Goddess, your Prancing Pagan Princess of Pain... Callisto!
Harley Quinn: And I am the Joke with the Most, your Wise-Cracking Clown Girl of Carnage ... Harley Quinn!
Callisto: Hello and Welcome to another exciting edition of CBUB! Clown Girl and I are here in the Bat Cave completely hidden and totally undetectable using our amazing God-Proof(TM) Inviso-Belts (may cause nausea, flatulence and sudden disappearances, keep out of reach of children). This way we can stay right on top of the action today without causing any interference.
Harley Quinn: That's right, Callisto. These belts are Space Ghost approved and render us invisible in the action packed scene unfolding before our very eyes.
Callisto: And there... there in the Bat Cave... is Victor Von Doom, old Plate Face himself, standing beside Batman's evil enemy the Penguin!
Harley Quinn: Yes, Dr. Doom and the Penguine both in the Batcave. And there... the final player in this sad, sad scene... Batman himself - battered... bruised.
Callisto: Blood trickles from Batman's mouth... half his face black and blue and starting to swell.
Harley Quinn: The bat costume is ripped and the flesh underneath bloody in many places... looks like Bat's left arm isn't working right anymore... it hangs limp at his side.
Callisto: Batman, wounded and broken, leans up against a scarred, burnt and dented Batmobile. The Batmobile looks like it has been driven through Hell and back.
Dr. Doom: So... this is the lair of the Batman. How quaint. There is no further need for Doom, here. This Batman is less than I had been led to believe. My attention is needed elsewhere.
Penguin: Whaat? Waauck! Ain't ya gonna finish him off?
Dr. Doom: You may do what you wish with Mr. Wayne. Other matters require the attention of Doom. I leave him to you. This was all too easy.
Batman: This game isn't finished yet...
Harley Quinn: What's that? In the shadows of the ceiling?
Callisto: That, Clown Girl, looks like the proverbial Calvary...
Harley Quinn: It's Batgirl! And Robin! Together! Wait, and more...
Callisto: the Catwoman is with them, and NightWing ...
Harley Quinn: Robin swings to the ground and goes running for a series of computers ... Robin will have to pass very close to Doom and Penguin to reach them...
Callisto: Batgirl, Catwoman and NightWing hit the ground next. NightWing throws a net bola at Penguin...
Harley Quinn: while Catwoman whips Dr. Dooms ankle! It looks like this is a diversion to buy time for Robin to get to those computers.
Callisto: The unsuspecting Penguin ... an easy mark for Night Wing's netting ... gets totally wrapped-up like a holiday present by the net bola!
Harley Quinn: But Dr. Doom... seeming to anticipate the Catwoman's whip... side steps casually ... dodging the whip!
Dr. Doom: Enough!
Callisto: Dr. Doom whirls to face his attackers...
Dr. Doom: Children. Is this what you'll hide behind, now, Mr. Wayne?
Harley Quinn: Dr. Doom makes a wave of his hand...
Callisto: ...Everthing seems to freeze!
Harley Quinn: Time seems to stop, suddenly, around Doom.
Callisto: Doom holds one hand up... Now Robin, Night Wing, Catwoman and Batgirl are all suddenly floating... limp like rag-dolls towards Dr. Doom.
Dr. Doom: Mr. Wayne... you have led me on a long evening's chase and have have caused me some inconvieniece. It is the will of Doom that this happen no more. You have an option - watch your friends and students here die... stuffing their corpses into the same guilt closet where you keep your parents, or, you may serve Doom by keeping his city... Gotham City... free of unsavory elements. You may begin with our mutual aquaintance Mr. Penguin, here. Doom has no more time for you - so choose!
Harley Quinn: ...
Harley Quinn: A barely perceptable nod by the Bat signals defeat.
Callisto: Batman slumps... suddenly looking tired.
Harley Quinn: With a snap of cyber-gauntleted fingers, Robin, Night Wing, Catwoman and Batgirl crash to the ground unconscious.
Callisto: Dr. Doom turns on his heel and... with a swish of his cape... strides from the Batcave.
THE FINAL VOTE
Dr. Doom: 581
The Batman: 554
THE WRAP UP
Callisto: Boy, that was tough.
Harley Quinn: Yeah. Batman preserved the lives of his friends... but at what cost?
Callisto: Yes, Doom wins for today... but who knows what will happen tomorrow.
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Related CBUB Fights:
Captain America vs. Batman
Dr. Doom vs. Lex Luthor
Boba Fett vs. Batman
Dr. Doom vs. Magneto
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