It Was That Last Jagermeister That Did It

Bozo criminal for today violated Bozo Rule Number #3344765: Hold off on the drinking if your escape vehicle is a bicycle. From the International File in Birmingham, England, comes the story of bozo Jay Lane who was spotted by police responding to a burglar alarm. He was pedaling away on his bicycle, clutching a flat screen TV. It was obvious he was impaired as he was swerving and struggling to stay upright before eventually crashing into a police car. When questioned by the cops, he told them that he had drunk 24 beers and a shot of Jagermeister before attempting to pull off his heist. And his reason for the theft? He had just recently been released from prison and was “bored.” He won’t be bored any longer. He’s headed back to jail.