Our bozo for today comes from Essexville, Michigan, where police were called to a report of a dementor flying around the neighborhood. As a note of clarification, “dementors” are magical beings from the Harry Potter series that can suck out a human’s happiness and create a general feeling of coldness, misery and despair. So quite obviously you wouldn’t want these dark-hooded characters flying around your neighborhood. Offices were dispatched and the “dementor” was quickly captured. Wasn’t a real dementor, though, just a black trash bag hanging from a tree limb. The bag is now in custody.