Yes, Alcohol WAS Involved…

  • 1 min read

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Troy House for sending in today’s report from the International File In Burnley, England, where our bozo made so many mistakes we feel obliged to count them. Mistake number one, he entered the Bottle Shop he planned to rob later and got friendly with the clerk, having a drink and even being given a free bottle of alcohol because the clerk liked him. Mistake number two was his choice of disguise when he returned. A zebra print onesie. The disguise only worked until our bozo opened his mouth, at which time the clerk immediately recognized him. To prove his was serious, he pulled a large carving knife on the clerk, who countered with a metal pipe he kept under the counter for just such emergencies. His third mistake was compounded by the weather. He fled the scene on a bike, which left fresh tracks in the snow. The cops followed the tracks to his residence where our bozo answered the door still wearing the onesie. Busted!