Bozo criminal for today violated Bozo Rule Number 33498: Always choose a proper weapon. From DeLand, Florida, comes the story of an unidentified 16-year-old bozo who walked into a convenience store, threatened the clerk with a bottle of ranch dressing and demanded cash. Undaunted, the clerk threatened back with her weapon of choice, a gun. For those of you keeping score, a gun always trumps a bottle of ranch dressing. Our bozo was arrested as he was running from the store.