Dead characters and the stories of their spectacular demise. Sorted by name.

To the Mortuary:
A—E
F—J
K—O
P—T
U—Z

Submit a character to the Mortuary.


Dead RPG Characters with names starting with P - T :

Ubar

Game System: Enchanter/Mindbender3E D&D
Occupation: Wizard
Player: Chris Longhurst
Gender: Male
Race: Goblin
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: Unknown
Place of Death: Halfway up a tower in a city I cant remember the name of.

Cause of Death: Ubar was killed by a lightning bolt. In fact, he was killed by several lightning bolts, all streaming from a broken wand of lightning bolts currently being held by some crazy mind-controlled guy. Why didnt he do what the others did and run away? Because he was pinned to the wall by the spike sticking out of his turban, after using said spike in combination with a jump spell as an attack which missed, attaching him firmly to the wooden panelling. To add insult to injury, his familiar (with evasion) survived.

Epitaph: Minions! Get me down from here! Wait, where are you going?
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Ulfang

Game System: 1st LevelAD&D
Occupation: Fighter
Player: Branden
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: 7 Coldeven
Date of Death: unknown
Place of Death: A Pole outside Homley

Cause of Death: Before his untimly death he and his party was in the ruined mote house hunting for tresure. Ulfang decided to take some of the tresure out to the Giant Goat. Instead of leaving the goat on the other side of the old bridge, he wanted to take it across with him.... the bridge colapesd killing the goat. As he walked inside the theif decided to yell at him for being so fooiish. So Ulfang cut his head off. Later that evening, the party druged and bound Ulfang and then impaled his body on a large wooden pole where he died instantly.

Epitaph: If you kill the only theif in the group,,,, you will end up with a stick up your behind.
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Ulmas the Halfwit

Game System: AD&D
Occupation: Thief
Player: Carl "The Groob" Grubert II
Gender: Male
Race: Halfling
Date of Birth: 9 Septum 68 RA
Date of Death: 23 Sextilis 45 RA
Place of Death: Tomb of Horrors

Cause of Death: Jumped into a fixed sphere of anihilation .

Epitaph: One who lept before he looked once too often.
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Unknown

Game System: D&D 3rd Edition
Occupation: 3rd level Wizard
Player: Jorma Hake
Gender: Male
Race: Gnome
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: about 50 years after he was born
Place of Death: Orc Camp

Cause of Death: We were invading an orc camp, and he was captured. The orcs used him for...pleasure.

Epitaph: When we found him, his ass was bigger than his face.
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Unknown

Game System: Star Frontiers
Occupation: Mercenary
Player: Richard Rose
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: ?
Date of Death: ?
Place of Death: Planet Terides (Ter-eye-dees)

Cause of Death: The characters, all mercs, had been hired by Storm Industries to retrieve an experimental device from pirates intending to sell the device to the Sathar. When the mercs finally trailed a pirate ship to its hidden base on the jungle world of Terides, they discover that the base was built into the face of a cliff. The hangar door was the only way in or out and the pirates had installed a sonic devestator to guard it. The characters decided a frontal assault was the only way to attack the base (the players werent the most imaginitive of folks). During the battle, the unknown merc managed to take out the pirate manning the sonic devestator with a well placed shot to the head. As the other characters worked on getting the hangar door open, the unknown merc liberated the sonic devestator from its mount. After successfully fighting their way through the pirate base, the characters find the device and make their way back to the hangar door where they come upon a large six-wheeled assault tank that immediately opened fire. During the fight, the unknown merc dove underneath the tank. Using his newly aquired sonic devestator, he fired straight up into the underside of the tank, ruptured the power core for the primary weapon, and was incinerated in the ensuing explosion.

Epitaph: A powerful weapon does not a brilliant hero make.
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UOogermuthe the Bold

Game System: AD&D 2nd Edition
Occupation: 13th level Sorcerer
Player: Travis
Gender: Male
Race: Half elf
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: Unknown
Place of Death: Tiamats Dungeon labyrinth.

Cause of Death: He lost control of magically captured lepracaun, which the leprecaun then turned his feet and head backwards. As he was ambling through the labyrinth, he then ran into a battle between two greater deamons and 16 lesser deamons. As a punishment they then took his arms. Finally he ran into a very unfriendly eight-armed skeleton, which cut off his head.

Epitaph: His death was very painful.
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Useless

Game System: AD&D
Occupation: Bard
Player: Alejandro Tazzer
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: 3th Mirtul 1253
Date of Death: 3rd Yftizan 1279
Place of Death: Belly of Arnaghadost the Wyrm.

Cause of Death: He was slowly, very slowly, digested by an evil wyrm. He was actually taking revenge for his father, eaten by the same wyrm 25 years before, for his mother, eaten 17 years before, his brother, eaten 4 years ago, his wife and his lover who were taking tea comfortably in a village near Arnaghadosts cave two years before and his daughter one year before. [I can picture it now... "This dragons eaten my whole family, what can I do about that? I know! Ill sit in its stomach until Im dead too!" *grin* —Gurth]

Epitaph: He was destined to die in the wyrms belly.
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Vernum De Sei

Game System: MERP/RoleMaster
Occupation: Adventuring level 5 Warrior Mage
Player: Damien J
Gender: Male
Race: Dunedain (High man)
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: Late spring, 3001 Third Age
Place of Death: The hills in Dunland, halfway between Edoras and Tharbad.

Cause of Death: Vernum and five other companions were on a quest to locate a lost Pantantir (seeing stone). In a random encounter one night, the party was attacked by a band of wargs (giant wolves). Vernum hurridly cast a spectacularly ineffective water bolt spell (that he had just mastered), then was beset by he wargs. One tore a piece from his right leg. The bite severed a major artery, and Vernum passed out and passed away.

Epitaph: Maybe I shouldve cast a defensive spell first.
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Viviel

Game System: AD&D, DMs Homeworld and Lankhmar
Occupation: 5th level Thief
Player: Isaac Rzonca
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: Year of the Wolf
Place of Death: World of Newhon City of Ilthmart.

Cause of Death: Shortly after the disappearance of his good friend Zaxxon, Viviel decided to infiltrate the Ilthmart Thieves Guild as that was the last place Zaxxon said he was going. Well during the initiation trial/ritual, Viviel was asked to enter a room and complete a simple thieving task in order to join up. He handled it well at first, going through the door and moving silently up to his "victim," he even stole the majority of the "victims gold" but then he asked the victim what to do next thereby failing the most important test.... the getaway! So with a flick of the foot, and a twist of the wrist a trapdoor was setoff and Viviel was subsequenty consumed by sewer-crocodiles.

Epitaph: "So uh... what do we do now?"
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VonGuthar

Game System: Vampire: The Masquerade
Occupation: Ventrue
Player: Cam
Gender: Male
Race: Vampire
Date of Birth: 845
Date of Death: 1996
Place of Death: Building site.

Cause of Death: While trying to break in to the building site he was rumbled by some security guards after a pitched battle to dead guards and dog, he had the misfurtune of running into a group of highly skilled vampire hunters on the way out of the place. He took out one but took a wooden crossbow bolt through the heart, then some dick of a gangrel thought that since he was low on blood to suck dry the first person he saw A.K.A me.

Epitaph: (mumbled) You fucking gangrel Bast.........
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Whiplash

Game System: Shadowrun
Occupation: Bum Physical Adept
Player: Morman
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: unknown
Date of Death: 2051
Place of Death: Inside a phone booth

Cause of Death: Multiple grenade wounds. His first combat, he had just sliced an extremely well armored foes head off with a monowhip, when another PC fired two grenades into the bar he was in. His feeble protection (bathrobe) was not enough to keep him from harms way.

Epitaph: Alas, he left this world in many small chunks.
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Wisdom Blade

Game System: AD&D
Occupation: 10th-level Cleric of Wee Jas
Player: Penelope
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: Um... 27 years ago, give or take
Date of Death: 27 years after he was born
Place of Death: A big fortress taken over by ogres

Cause of Death: Well... wed entered the fortress through a tunnel, fighting a bunch of wights and other various undead along the way. Everyone racked up damage - except Wisdom, who did his clerical thing and turned the undead. We got into the fortress, and the monk was smashed into the wall when an orge slammed open the door. The monk was also pushed off the top of the tower while the rest of us where fighting downstairs. Continuing through the fortress. Came across some gay ogres... that was bad... and discovered that the orges had defiled the temple. Naturally, Wisdom got rather annoyed at this and stayed to clear up the temple while the others kept investigating. Wisdom discovered a child hiding in the temple. Calmed the kid down. The monk returned. Followed by an ogre-mage. The ogre-mage attacked. Wisdom launched himself over the child, to shield it. The monk, who had severely pissed off the ogre-mage, launched himself UNDER the child. Big whopping greatsword came down. Skewered Wisdom and the kid and killed them both. Goddamned monk got away with 12 points of damage. Wisdom intends to haunt him...

Epitaph: "See, those chaotic neutral monks are a BAD thing..."
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Wounded Hawk

Game System: Old WaysDeadlands, Hell on Earth d20
Occupation: Harrowed Brave
Player: Tom OKeefe
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: mid 1800s
Date of Death: 2078
Place of Death: Cordell, Oaklahoma

Cause of Death: Hawk was a very skilled indian brave, and the backbone of our party. Hed survived two adventures in Deadlands, and we were on our way to finding the Lost Conquistadore Mine, when we were set upon by a veritable legion of undeas cavalry...None of us survived, but Hawk and a gun-totin preacher, Joseph Jaret, got their sould hijacked and forced back into being as Harrowed. As the new Hell on Earth book had just come out, we all decided this was a good time to shift the setting, so those of us who were non-harrowed simply made up new Hell on Earth characters, and the two Harrowed would simply live out the intercedint 200+ years, being undead and essentially immortal, barring any stupid mistakes. Things were all well and good until a local judge sentended eight indians to jail for no real reason. Hawk decided to take matters into his own hands, and made SEVERAL bad move silent rolls to sneak to the judges chambers, alerting the guards (unbeknowst to him). He got in, killed the two guards at the Judges door in a single hit each, and burst in on the Judge, killing him in a most unpleasant manner. Then, the sirens went off....looking out the window, the building was surrounded completely by armed guards, and the other Harrowed, Joseph Jaret, who had been trying to convince them all the noise was the result of a 10-foot ferret (You really dont want to know). Wounded Hawk then made a fateful decision, to jump out of the third story window and make a break for it. He landed just fine, but everyone started shooting, including Jaret (who was still a trigger-happy freak after living over 200 years), who was the one who put a hole clean through Wounded (now Dead) Hawks skull, inflicting a wound that would keep even a Harrowed down.

Epitaph: Damnit Jaret, not again!!!!
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Wrenn the Runner

Game System: AD+D 2nd Edition
Occupation: 8th level Thief
Player: Francesco
Gender: Male
Race: Dark Elf
Date of Birth: 348 C.Y
Date of Death: 401 C.Y
Place of Death: City of Greyhawk (Green Dragon Inn)

Cause of Death: Attempted to pick-pocket a wizards bag of holding. He managed to get the bag from the wizard without him noticing, but his invisible quasit familiar, pearched on the wizards shoulder, saw the whole thing! He alerted the wizard of Wrenns heist. While Wrenn was proudly walking out of the inn, a crackling bolt of lightning hit him square in the back. Wrenn was fried alive, but the bag made a succesful saving throw and survived the wizards attack. To the victor go the spoils!

Epitaph: Always run after pick-pocketing a wizard!
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Xirokiia Alidiia

Game System: AD&D 1st Ed
Occupation: Fighter/Magic User
Player: Alexander Bailey
Gender: female
Race: centaur
Date of Birth: unknown
Date of Death: unknown; died at age 26
Place of Death: a wemic monastery

Cause of Death: Xirokiia, AKA "X", loved magical artifacts, and couldnt have enough of them. One day during a dungeon-crawl, she was pillaging a room full of ancient artifacts, not giving a thought to the idea that they may be cursed. Within a minute of finishing, at least one of the artifacts proved cursed and turned her into a monkey. The first time around, she managed to keep her sanity, but through the efforts of a hungry barbarian and a misguided cleric, she turned back and forth between centaur and monkey several times before finally losing her sanity and truly becoming a monkey. The cleric eventually was able to divest her of the curse, but the end result was a centauress with the mind of a monkey. The party decided that the best course of action was to give her over to the care of a nearby monastery of wemics (dont ask), in hopes that they could help her. Sadly they failed, and X lived out the rest of her short days trying to climb trees and crushing them with her great mass; she finally fell out of a tree just wrong and broke her neck. The wemic priests buried her under a banana tree (again, dont ask) and played horseshoes with her headstone while chanting prayers to the gods for the safe passage of her soul to the Happy Prancing Grounds in the Sky.

Epitaph: "Eep!"
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Yder Y. Yden

Game System: Star Wars Role Playing Game
Occupation: Hunter
Player: Stephen Cauley
Gender: male
Race: Ewok
Date of Birth: ????
Date of Death: 25 years later
Place of Death: Planet of Recardia

Cause of Death: Our squadron was attacking a palace on the planet of Recardia. Turbo lasers were shooting out in all directions. Yder watched the fight from below, but his attention was grabbed by a shiny, round object in the open cockpit of an xwing in the hanger. I failed his willpower roll. (He collects shiny objects) and Yder jumped into the cockpit. While moving around inside, he hit the auto pilot switch. While in mid air, Yder started to play with the object and hit a switch on it. Too bad he never heard of thermal detonaters before that moment. The whole ship was engulfed in flames and crashed into the palace throne room, killing the dutchess. Unfortunately, the Duke wasnt in the castle that day.

Epitaph: Whoocha.
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Yolgoth

Game System: AD&D
Occupation: Dumb Barbarian
Player: Ryan Hackett
Gender: Male
Race: Half-Giant
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: Unknown
Place of Death: Some unnamed cave (generic dungeon).

Cause of Death: He made fun of a group of mages, very weak ones might I add, which began to throw magic missles at him. He continued to make fun of them, despite the missiles, until his friends dragged him away. But, alas, a they ran from the angry mages, they ran into a group of trolls. Afraid for their own lives, they dropped Yolgoth and ran. Poor Yolgoths last sight was the inside of a cookpot.

Epitaph: He could have been a good fighter.
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yoxel

Game System: D&D 3E
Occupation: rouge
Player: Andrew
Gender: female
Race: halfling
Date of Birth: 156 AC
Date of Death: 176AC
Place of Death: In the third layer of a really large crypt

Cause of Death: We were exploring an anteroom in the crypt of a long-dead king. My charicter was first-level, and had, the night before, made a bear-trap. During a zombie attack, I decided to use the bear trap as a melee weapon. Big mistake. One critical failure later, my charicter died of shock fro a very messy amputation.

Epitaph: That has got to hurt!
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Zaldon

Game System: 3rd Edition D&D
Occupation: 3rd level cleric
Player: too annoyed to say
Gender: male
Race: dwarf
Date of Birth: unkown
Date of Death: unknown
Place of Death: deep in a high level wizards dungeon

Cause of Death: last battle of the dungeon againts the high level with a sorcerer ,a fighter and a barbarian in my group. The wizard has a glowing blue stone set on an alter that fuels his power. One by one my party members try to knock it off its pedastal but instead methodically become its thralls as they touch it. They team up on my dwarf overwhelming him and forcing him to touch the stone. The wizard then forces our group to fight each other. I die first because the wizard helps out.GAH...

Epitaph: What was my group thinking and why did they have to fail their saves?!
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Zaxxon

Game System: AD&D, DMs Homeworld & travel to Lankhmar
Occupation: 12th Level Halfling Thief
Player: Isaac Rzonca
Gender: Male
Race: Hairfoot halfling
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: The Year of the Wolf (Lankhmar)
Place of Death: The World of Newhon in the Cit of Ilthmart.

Cause of Death: He tried to double-deal the Ilthmart Thieves Guild and a fence of theirs and was stupid enough to get caught. The fence pulled a lever sending him down a shaft to an underground temple complex devoted to the RAT GOD whereupon the gods followers (wererats, go figure) devoured him alive. Word of advice, never threaten a fence with dire consequences.

Epitaph: When I get back up there, youll be sorry mister!!!
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Zep Dek

Game System: Star wars RPG The D6 version
Occupation: Jedi knight
Player: Philip Mcfarland
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: A couple of years after Yavin
Date of Death: 3 years after Return of the jedi
Place of Death: In a deserted planet.

Cause of Death: While searching for food after his space ship crashed (long story, never trust an autopilot), he came across a Rancor. Thinking it would make a good meal, he attacked with his lightsaber. NEVER ATTACK A RANCOR WITH A MELEE ATTACK. All thats left of him is a gressey smear.

Epitaph: "Stupid droids"
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#3174

Game System: Homemade system
Occupation: Shocktrooper-Cyborg
Player: Josh Jargon
Gender: N/A
Race: Human
Date of Birth: N/A
Date of Death: 6/27/2006
Place of Death: Battlefield on an un-named planet

Cause of Death: Came in as a backup, for a war against a terrorist organization.The group made it through the first part of the world and took out a camp of terrorist soldiers along with around 200 other foot soldiers. Then he went through a mine field on a hover-bike he had stolen, it hit a mine and exploded, causing him to roll through a mine field, without hitting another mine. Then he got up to run across the rest of the mine field, only to lose his whole right leg to a mine. After leaving the mine field, he attached a rifle to his right stub so he would have somewhat of a leg. Then the whole group stole a jeep, started to escape, and 6 fighter jets came up on them and opened fire. The shocktrooper-cyborg bravely started firing his long range fusion cannon at the jets one by one. He took 3 out of the sky, and then the jeep got hit. Everyone flew out going around 110 mph, but lived. then the shocktrooper took down 2 more jets after dodging some plasma missles. then everyone looked for cover, except the shocktrooper, he bravely stood to fight against the jet, He let a few fusion rounds off from his cannon, then when they missed and the jet came back around, it let off a melee of 15 plasma missles, ripping off the whole lower torso, and destroying his life support systems.

Epitaph: UH, OH!!
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"Cat"

Game System: AD&D
Occupation: None, really. He was a part of a gang, I guess youd call it.
Player: Penelopé
Gender: Male
Race: Human
Date of Birth: Never actually found out
Date of Death: About twenty years after his birth
Place of Death: The mansion of the evil werewolf-demon-y thing that had kidnapped our leaders girlfriend

Cause of Death: Basically, me, Raven, Snake, Bear and Wolf were trying to rescue Ravens girlfriend, Ariana. I had a thing for the girl and, naturally, wanted to take all the credit for rescuing her while the others took all the wounds. So I left them fighting a bunch of werewolves and went into another room, where Ariana happened to be lying tied up on a bed. And the werewolf-demon-y thing that had kidnapped her also happened to be there - not lying tied up on a bed, which would have posed some interesting questions but made things so much easier for me. I went for Ariana, and the werewolf-demon-y thing used some sort of touch attack to rob me of all but 1 hit point. And then stabbed me in the back while I tried to untie Ariana. Left in the situation of "if I move, I fall into unconsciousness and have to roll to stabilise", I figured, hell, if Im gonna die, Im gonna die happy. So I rolled over and snogged Ariana, and promptly fell into unconsciousness. Snake, the guy who could have healed me, entered the room, took one look at the tableau and called the others to slaughter the werewolf-demon-y thing. After sticking his poisoned dagger into me. And, to top it off, Raven (our leader) ran me through a dozen times, to make sure I was really dead. After the game, the DM told us that we were all the same person - Raven had multiple personalities. So I was killed by, well, myself!

Epitaph: "Hey, look, theres Ariana!... hey, look, the evil guy... hoo boy...
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"The Ambassador"

Game System: AEON TRINITY
Occupation: Telepath Diplomat
Player: KUBE
Gender: Male
Race: Chinese human
Date of Birth: Unknown
Date of Death: 25 years later
Place of Death: Abandoned Space Station

Cause of Death: Attached to an exploration mission as the diplomate/ first contact expert (and secretly to spy on their activities). Arrived at a "Lost" space station with no power but a vast quantity of lifeforms. Investigation revealed not only hostile bioweapons based loosely off the movie aliens but the race that created them. While fleeing back to the ship to escape the bioweapons the crew stumbled into an ambush by their creators. In the confusion of the ensuing battle the ambassador became confused as to weither grenade blast radii are measured in feet or meters. oops.

Epitaph: Surgeons log: Ambassador Chan does not play well with oXhXrX Explosives.
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