 | "Hell is empty, and all the devils are here." - Shakespeare, The Tempest, act 1 scene 2. The Devil is cunning. Everybody knows that. That's why he doesn't have to be. It all comes naturally to him. Everything he does is considered cunning because everybody's so damn suspicious. After all, what's more cunningly natural than falling in love with a pretty little thing and having the Anti-Christ out of wedlock? Having twins of course, and it's just like the Devil to do something devious like that. But no matter what you do, who you are or how "normal" your life seems to those around you, there comes a time in every parent's tenor when decisions had to be made. More specifically, when your children's bodies are going through certain... changes, and they start looking at other boys and girls in a way that might disturb other parents if they ever got wind of it. That's when the parent has to decide, just ignore it, or have "the talk". For Wick & Ed, they just HAD to have a father who opted for the embarassingly infamous speech. And after they heard it, it shouldn't have surprised them why he sadistically chose to do so. It didn't. Everything fell into place. Why dad wouldn't take a holy vow to marry mom eventhough they clearly love each other. Why they were a God-fearing family who never went to church. Why the two of them had been having a sudden "hunger" for those around them. Even what dad actually did for a living. All things considered, Wick & Ed took it pretty well. No one in town outside the immediate family were left alive to attest to that, but they did, they really did. It still wasn't as well as the Devil had hoped though, but it did answer some questions concerning their respective futures. The two of them... The world was no place for a couple of kids. They had to show the world that. They had to earn their middle names, Satan. They had to go home. Go to Hell. | Personality: "B-B-B-Bad. B-B-B-Bad. B-B-B-Bad. Bad to the bone." - George Thorogood, Bad to the bone. Ah, don't get the wrong idea. It's true that the terrible two represent the Adversary, but that's hardly a bad thing. Okay, by definition, it IS a bad thing, but that doesn't mean that they're bad children. Except in the context of them not being "good" children. In fact, they are a perfectly well adjusted pair of adolescents (whowereraisedbytheDevilhimself). Again, Wick & Ed are not bad. That's an unfair and resentful labeling. They're evil, thank you very much. Now move along. |
 | | Strength: | Weak BELOW normal human strength -
can bench press 50 pounds (maybe). | Agility: | Weak BELOW normal human agility.
Slow and uncoordinated. | | Body: | Weak BELOW normal human endurance.
Goes down easy and stays there. | Mind: | Weak BELOW normal human mental power.
Not the sharpest tack in the drawer. |
 | Wictoria St. Beelzebub |
- Power: Psychic Vampire
- Level:Standard
- Auto-Hit This mental attack hits the target automatically, but may or may not effect them.
"Thank heaven, for little girls; For little girls get bigger everyday. Thank heaven, for little girls; They grow up in the most delightful way." - Maurice Chevalier, Gigi. That's Wictoria with a double-lewd. Which stands to reason why Wicky or Wick would be subject to the same convention. Wick's the friendly-chatty sort, but she's at that age it's still considered cute and charming. She's got a wit of guillotine edge and effectiveness she does. Being the daughter of the Devil of course meant that you had certain responsibilities that came part and parcel with the gig. Being daddy's little girl of course meant she started early, even before the changes started and daddy dropped the bomb. Yup, Wick's the sort of girl who could eat anything and as much of it as she liked and still never lose her budding figure. A living beacon of envy for all those around her, and right now, soul food's her cuisine of choice. Sure, the blood and gore is messy but they're not so bad. Besides, soul is mm-mmmm yummy in the tummy. It's worth a little trouble, don't you think?
 | Edward St. Beelzebub |
"...... ...... ...... needs ketchup." - Edward St. Beelzebub. *whisperME* wHo are yOu? I'm *hungry* goddoesn'tlove me does hE? *dad* That's right son, just like Ishowedyouhow It's don*e* I'm hungry. Eat me! Bite me! *withpleasure* WhispeR me Ed ed. eD? aaaaaaaaaarrrrggggghhhhhi'mgonnakillyouPunk. I love ya sis *these are my thoughts? * I'm confused. Changes kids, you're going through changes. Maggots. The both oF you are *MAGGOTS*! I love your mother very much. webothloveyoukiDs very much Never Never Forget. That. DoNt be afraid, there's noThingwrong*with the*two*of*You. Ed. Ed? Ed. Say something ed. Yes? what are*youAbouTosay?* ...... ...... ...... hungry.
 | Miasma of Dismembered Souls |
- Power: Telepathy
- Level:Supreme
- Kit Power Link: Overlord
"Lunch was Dead Man's Fingers and Eyeball Pudding..." - Terry Pratchett, Soul Music, page 56. Picture this. Say Wick bites a finger off and eats it, the flesh and piece of finger shaped soul are both consumed. Ed chomps down on another finger, but only the flesh is devoured, the soul is still there. Then Wick chows down on somewhere else, as does Ed. Picturing? It's sort of gruesome if you could see the souls, not that the physical aspect of it isn't not for the weak of heart. There's just a lot less static tormented spiritual moaning. Of course the souls cling on to Wick & Ed, souls are like that, they cling. Like doplets of oil on a watery surface. That's how souls keep meeting up with the same other souls you see. They cling, in Wick & Ed's case, they form a miasma of dismembered souls, all moaning and groaning, spiritually so thick that you couldn't cut it with a knife like you could through butter, since the knife would just sort of be, well, cushioned. Still, it's the thought that counts. Thick with souls, picture?
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| Beelzebub Inc. |
- Power: Telepathy
- Level:Supreme
- Kit Power Link: Overlord
"Go on, take a bite. What harm could it do." - The Devil, Garden of Eden. Hello, I'm Simon, Simon Baracukus Feild, CEO of Beelzebub Inc. The pleasure is all mine I assure you. So let's talk about favoritism shall we? It's unreasonable as well as unfair, not to mention being a blatant abuse of power on the part of whoever's bestowing said favoritism. Don't you agree? Then again, don't you also agree that if the world suddenly spun off its axis and plummets toward the sun, everyone would be vaporized much less simply burnt to a crisp. Get with the program here people. Wick & Ed are MY children, and I'm the DEVIL. I don't play nice because quite honestly, I'm just not nice. If I want to devote the resources of Hell toward the fulfillment of my personal schemes, for my children, there's not a hell of a lot you can do about it. Now you know what harm taking a bite could do.
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| Avatars of Gluttony |
- Power: Telepathy
- Level:Supreme
- Kit Power Link: Overlord
"We're on a mission from God." - Blues Brothers. So Wick & Ed were going for a sunny day walk in the park, but to make a long story short, that's how they were acquited of 6 accounts of first degree murder. Funny thing about them murders though, they were all Satans. Astaroth's Sloth, Asmodeus' Lust, Mammon's Wrath etcetera. You know, the bad guys. All of them Hellward bound, where they'd actually do the most harm with the infernal forces. Wreaking sin with a purpose, there are dark machinations at foot and Wick & Ed are vanguarding it all on. Where Beelzebub's Gluttony are sinning could only lead them toward the tormented depths, how Wick & Ed get there though, is up in the air.
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| x0 |
- Power: Telepathy
- Level:Supreme
- Kit Power Link: Overlord
"You observe there are no divisions between the words." - Edgar Allen Poe, the Gold-Bug. At the end of the day, this is still God's playground. We bend the rules a bit, but there are just some rules that are hard to break. So hard in fact, that as yet, they've never been broken. 1 & 1 is nonetheless 2. So let us look at it from the factor: 0. A simple mathematical equation. Wick & Ed are 0. And that is that. Because God does not love them. They are 0. But they are still in the equation. Humanity has a number. Celestial and Infernal have a number. But Wick & Ed are 0. Everything has a number, save the two unloved by God. So question this, what do you get when you multiply by 0? 1 x 0? 100 x 0? 666 x 0? It all leads to 0. If things are greater than the sum of their parts, then in factoring the 0, it is reduced to 0. Wick & Ed are the 0, do the math.
 | That's just crazy talk! |
"Gee mister! Can we have your soul?" - Wicktoria St. Beelzebub. Today was another typical day for our antagonists. Except, a typical day would be BOOOORING! So Ed, let's do something today. "...... ...... ......" said Ed. So then I thought we'd go to the park where it was nice and bright and quiet and we could just relax. "...... ...... ......" replied Ed aghast. So yeah, I came to my senses and decided we'd go to this arcade next to some pool bar instead where it was smelly and loud and dark and the games were all the naughty kind and there was this underlying veil of threat. "Cooooool!" chimed Wick. Was that me? Anyway, so that's where our brave duo went and had a really fun time. Except it wasn't because it WAS smelly and the drunk people there were annoying and nobody really paid us any attention 'cept this one guy who had this vibe that probably meant he was a pervert of something. So then Ed said "...... ...... ......" and we all laughed, because it was funny. So then we left for home all happy-like 'cause the day ended up not so bad and all the people at that joint ended up dead Dead DEAD! And it was all thanks to Ed! Nothing that can my Ed down. Nothing gets in our way, NOTHING. Anything that tries to stop us... ooohhh, how they wished they hadn't even triiiied. They'd stop DEAD in their tracks. And Ed cap it all of with a "...... ...... ...... burp", yay!
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