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#1 Guest_Ivan_*

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 05:25 AM

I don't care how old you are, cooking for your parents tends to impress them (especially if you're a dude.)
Plus, someday you might want to shut off your XBox and invite a girl over (cooking tends to impress them too and practicing on your parents is a good way to hone your skills.)

So here it is, the thread where we share our favorite recipes.

#2 Guest_Ivan_*

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 05:51 AM

Zatarain's Jambalaya mix is SUPER simple, (like Hamburger Helper simple) and adding some cornbread (another ridiculously simple dish) makes it a meal, enough for four or five people (or three people if you live in my family.) You can just follow the directions on the box (cook rice, add meat, let simmer... it's really that easy,) but here are my favorite modifications:

(If you're making cornbread, mix that up first. Then while it's baking you can make the Jambalaya.) Put however much water it says to into the pot (2 1/2 cups I think.) Now it says add vegetable oil. Instead, I add beef fat. Throw on the lid, let it boil, then add the rice. Follow the directions and reduce the heat and let the rice cook.
Now instead of adding fresh meat I add cooked meat, which means I add it later. Instead of ten minutes in, I add the meat twenty minutes in. The meat I was using was 1/2 pound of those tiny pre-cooked frozen peeled shrimp (thawed and rinsed,) 1/2 pound Andoullie Sausage, and 1/2 pound grilled chicken breast (the hot links and the chicken were obviously cut up into appropriate sized pieces.) The recipe calls for a pound of meat, I add more. Stir in all the meat and let simmer. If you don't like seafood, ham or more chicken is a good substitute. If you don't like the spicyness of Andoullie Sausage, any regular sausage works too, but you're going to loose a bit of flavor.

The cornbread I made was real Southern cornbread with onions and jalapenos and cheddar, but if your family is not accustomed to Southern style cornbread (which is actual bread) you might want to stick with the super-easy Jiffy cornbread mix that most people know (which is a more like cake.) If you make the Jiffy version, follow the recipe on the box. If you go for the real deal, I like this recipe. Please note that this style of cornbread can be a bit dry, and it's recommended to serve it with sour cream, butter, or margarine.

Today I served the Jambalaya and Cornbread with a simple salad and mixed drinks (because I know my parents.) You should feel free to garnish it any way you want (try not to add more carbs to the meal though!)

#3 Soberguy

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 12:01 PM

Peanut Butter Sandwich a la Soberguy:

1) Get two slices of bread. White or brown is acceptible, but not pita as it's unpatriotic. Never use the crusty endpiece of the loaf - that's only good for feeding ducks. If you are a duck, then OMG U R MAKING SAMMICH HOW CUTE LOLOLLOL!
2) Open a jar of peanut butter. This is important, as not opening the jar makes getting the peanut butter extremely difficult.
3) Use a knife to get some peanut butter out of the jar. Use a butter knife, not a steak knife. A switchblade may be used, but only if you are a badass and/or wearing fingerless leather gloves.
4) Spread the peanut butter on one of the slices of bread. Do not spread it on both - there are starving people in Africa, douchebag! Ensure that it is spread thickly and evenly, allowing a 0.5 cm margin from the crust to allow for squishage. If you don't know how much 0.5 cm is, then you are probably an American.
5) Put the un-buttered slice on top of the buttered slice. Line them up nicely - no one likes a sloppy sandwich. Press together lightly.
6) Do not cut your sandwich in halves, quarters or any other similar fraction. This ain't tea time, you Nancy.
7) Put the sandwich on a plate. A small one - don't waste a dinner plate on a f*cking sandwich. Someone has to wash that you know!
8) Place plate next to computer, leaving enough room to safely operate the mouse.
9) Load City of Heroes. Login.
10) Enjoy!

#4 Dark Ranger X

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 12:38 PM

DRX's quick marinade ribs:

- Buy meat (could use Pork/Beef/Lamb).
- In a bowl, mix about 1 part worcestershire sauce with about 3 parts tomato sauce/ketchup. Worcestershire is needed to thin the sauce out, and also adds flavour.
- Throw in equal dashes of salt and pepper, and some minced garlic.
- Ensure you've put enough Worcestershire in to make the marinade not taste completely like sauce/ketchup. You want the marinade to begin to take on the dark colour of the Worcestershire; it won't take too much.
- Cover ribs and sit in refrigerator for at least 3-4 hours.
- Cook. I prefer to bake ribs in the oven - around 30mins each side on 180C (350F). Use the time in between flipping them over to baste them.
- Serve with salad and chips.

#5 Guest_Ivan_*

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 06:44 PM

Bake ribs? In the Oven? Man aren't you from Australia, land of Outback Steakhouse? I thought you guys knew how to grill?

#6 The Seeker of Stuff

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 10:17 PM

PRIME RIB
1. The cook tells you to make the prime rib for tonights special. Point out that as the Dishwasher you feel that the Cook should prepare the special. The cook points out that you are the only on that knows how to season it right. Mumble that you don't get paid enough for this and start to find the spices.

2.Go on a epic quest to find the spices that no one ever puts back in the right space. You shall need: onion powder, thyme, rosemary, minced garlic, Cajun seasoning, Worcestershire sauce, Beef base, and Vegetable oil.

3. Get a bowl.

4. In said bowl mix
1 serving spoon minced garlic
1 serving spoon beef base
3 tsp onion powder
3 tsp Worcestershire sauce
2 tsp Cajun seasoning
2 tsp thyme
2 tsp rosemary
1/3 cup Vegetable oil

5.Put the Prime Rib in a pan and rub in down with the contents of the bowl.

6. Tell the cook that the damn prime rib is ready to be put in the oven.

7. I think that they cook it on 350 till it's done. I never cared enough to ask.

#7 comic_book_fan

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 10:26 PM

get a bowl pour ceral in bowl and milk.

or grab keys get in car and drive to subway.

get bologna put it between two peices of bread and cheese and mayo.

#8 Dark Ranger X

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 10:28 PM

Bake ribs? In the Oven? Man aren't you from Australia, land of Outback Steakhouse? I thought you guys knew how to grill?


It's hard to grill in a conventional kitchen oven.

Of course, you could apply this to your outdoor kitchens, too.

#9 The Seeker of Stuff

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 10:31 PM

get bologna put it between two peices of bread and cheese and mayo.


I actually won my 4th grade 4H demonstration contest with a Bologna and cheese sandwich.

#10 comic_book_fan

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Posted 05 March 2010 - 11:58 PM

I actually won my 4th grade 4H demonstration contest with a Bologna and cheese sandwich.

realy ? ive never won anything with my sanwich.

#11 Skirmisher

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Posted 06 March 2010 - 01:03 AM

1) Preheat oven to med or high. It doesn't have to be specific, just a good temp.

2) Get Elbow Noodles, cook them until just under done. Don't worry they'll finish cooking later.

3) While the noodles are cooking, Grate some fresh mild Cheddar. Stop when you have a nice sized handful.

4) Get a can of Tomatoes, if whole, crush them.

5) Get an oven safe ceramic or glass dish. About 3+" deep, and big enough to hold you noodles.

6) Mix noodles and tomatoes w/ juice in dish, then cover with the grated cheese.

7) stick in oven until cheese is fully melted.

8) Serve with Butter and Salt.


Great Changes to the Recipe!

* Swap out for different noodles... though try to stay away from long stringy kinds.
* Add seasoning as you mix Noodles and Tomato w/ Juice.
* Swap out for different kinds of Cheese.
* Mix cheese w/ noodles & tomatoes, in addition to top layer.
* After cheese is melted, Broil until golden brown. <- personal fav.

#12 Guest_Ivan_*

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Posted 06 March 2010 - 03:31 AM

It's hard to grill in a conventional kitchen oven.

Of course, you could apply this to your outdoor kitchens, too.


I just assume "kitchen" in Australia means a raging fire with a cast-iron grill.

#13 RakaiThwei

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Posted 06 March 2010 - 05:14 PM

Home Made Shrimp

Ingredients

Frozen Shrimp with the tail off
Lemon Juice
Butter
Old Bay Seasoning

Utensils

1) 1 Pan
2) 1 Spatula
3) 1 Knife

Cooking

1) Take the frozen shrimp place it within a deep bowl, pour hot water in the bowl and keep the shrimp submersed until it is warm and soft.

2) Take the butter and cut at least an inch of butter. Place the butter in the pan and turn the stove on to high, to melt the butter. Spread the butter around the pan to make sure that it's all moist while it melts. When the butter is liquified, set the stove on medium so you won't burn the moist butter. Pour two tea spoons of lemon juice into the buttered up pan.

3) Place the shrimp into the pan and use the spatula to spread the shrimp around. Shake the Old Bay seasoning over the shrimp as it is cooking. Shake about twelve times. Use the spatula to stir and turn over the shrimp as it is cooking. This also adds the seasoning to the other side of the shrimp. Stir and turn over frequently. Keep stiring and turning until the orange sauce, which is made by the mixture of the lemon juice and butter and Old Bay seasoning is thick and oily.

4) Place the shrimp onto a plate and enjoy.

-Rakai'Thwei

#14 Guest_Ivan_*

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Posted 06 March 2010 - 10:28 PM

Old Bay Seasoning


For some reason I can't stand Old Bay. I think it's because my grandmother used to coat Salmon and Crab Cakes in the stuff.

#15 Magnus

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Posted 06 March 2010 - 11:53 PM

We need MMM back to give us his recipe for steak, It's been two years but i still remember that it was one of the best cooking articles I've ever read.

Recipe for secret Coney Island hotdog sauce soon to come . . .

#16 ThePoet

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Posted 07 March 2010 - 12:06 AM

My dumbass college roommate actually managed to screw up Hamburger Helper. Here's a meal I can cook in 30 minutes and impress the heck out of anyone. All measurements are approximate since I don't use a measuring cup.(They're for amateurs)

First up: Ouzo Beef Tips
1 pound sirloin beef tips.
Mix 1/2 cup virgin olive oil.
1/8 cup lime juice
1/8 cup lemon juice
1 table spoon pepper
1 table spoon salt
Once mixed, toss beef tips in mixture. Cook over a hot griddle or a George Foreman Grill until desired. I recommend medium-well.

Pan fried potatoes:
3 Russet potatoes, skinned and chopped into 1 centimeter cubes.
Put two table spoons of mexican spiced Olive Oil in a medium fry pan over medium high heat.
Use this combination of spices:
Garlic. If not available, garlic powder may be used.
Season Salt
Crushed Black Pepper
A pinch of Red Pepper
A pinch of Dill seeds
A pinch of dried mustard
3 table spoons minced onion(optional because my wife hates them.)
Cook until golden brown, about 20-25 minutes.

Next: Asparagus
20 Asparagus stalks.
Trim asparagus by breaking off ends toward the root.
Fill a medium sauce pan half full of water. Put asparagus in. Turn to high heat. As soon the water boils, asparagus is done.

Serve all this with a nice red wine or for the non-alcohol drinkers such as my family, a rich berry-flavored juice. This meal serves about 3 people.

-ThePoet

#17 Tarvius

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Posted 07 March 2010 - 12:46 PM

Homemade BBQ Sauce

All measurements are an estimation

Over a cup of Honey

About a cup of Ketchup

A third of a large can of Tomatoe Paste

6 garlic cloves (minced)

A splash of lemon juice (Approx 2 Tbs)

Cocoa Powder is half the amount of lemon juice

A pinch of onion powder

Equal parts paprika, soy sauce, and Worcestershire sauce which should all be about the same amount as the cocoa powder (Approx 1 Tbs each)


- Add ketchup, honey, and tomatoe paste to a large pot turned to medium-high heat.
- Mix together completely
- Add minced garlic, and lemon juice.
- Give it a few quick stirs.
- Add Cocoa powder, onion powder, paprika, soy sauce, and Worcestershire sauce.
-Mix completely until its a nice smooth maroon color.
- Let the sauce cook until it begins to simmer
- Reduce heat to low or medium low, and let sit for at least 10 min stirring occasionally.

#18 treacherous

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Posted 07 March 2010 - 05:49 PM

A recipe from Treach's Big Book Of Cook:

Page 1
..............................

That's all I got.




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