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Match 14638 The Angry Video Game Nerd vs. Captain N: the Game Master

Captain N AVGN RIP Electric Ferret Electricferret.com Website

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#1 HulkSmashSpammers

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Posted 23 August 2013 - 12:17 PM

AVGN was struggling against King Hippo as he played Mike Tyson's Punch-Out on his Advantage.

"Come on, come on! Open your damn mouth already!"

King Hippo readied his jab as he opened his mouth. The nerd dodged too late as Hippo socked Mac and depleted over half of his health bar.

"*vulgarity*!! This piece of shit arcade controller's wearing out on me!!"

"You're not dodging fast enough!" Said his guitarist, Kyle Justin, who was sitting right next to him. "Don't blame your controller because you suck."

"*vulgarity* you! Maybe you should be behind the couch more often!" Retorted the AVGN.

"IM SICK OF YOUR SHIT!!" yelled Kyle. "I HAVE A NAME! It's Kyle! And Im done guitaring your shitty-ass narcissistic theme song! I'm going out-of-state...to be a SOMEBODY! Not some four-eyed alcoholic's bitch!"

Kyle smashed his guitar into the back of the Nerd's head before he could even tell him "good *vulgarity*ing luck." The Nerd was out of commission, and lay lifeless on the floor of his living room. Kyle dragged his KO'd body to the back of the couch.

"My turn to play some games, before I finally embark." Said Kyle. "Feels good being the gamer for once."

Kyle knocked the Hippo backwards for a KO, and a victory screen.

---------

The Nerd opened his eyes to see something beyond his imagination. He saw a little boy with red hair floating in the air with angel wings, another child in a green jumpsuit and helmet, a Hispanic blonde man with a pair of goggles and snow coat who looked like he came out of a Disney film, a quite beautiful woman in a pink dress and a tiara, and a teenager with a red Varsity jacket marked with an N and a brown, neat haircut.

"He's finally come to!" Said the green kid.

"Where...where the *vulgarity* am I?" Asked the Nerd.

"You're in VideoLand." Said the teenager. "Allow us to introduce ourselves. I'm Captain N, but call me Kevin."

The green kid was Mega Man, the angel was Kid Icarus, the Hispanic was Simon Belmont, and the brunette princess was Princess Lana.

"Wait...you're...the....cast of that cartoon show?" Asked the Nerd.

"Cartoon?" Asked Kevin.

"I think he got knocked too hard-icus." Said Icarus.

"Jesus...gotta lay off the *vulgarity*ing Rolling Rock."

He felt a sharp pain in his right butt-cheek like a whip. It was Simon's.

"You watch your language in front of Her Highness, young man!" Scolded Simon.

"Whatever..." Mumbled the Nerd. "Why the f...heck am I even here?"

"The Power Glove malfunctioned." Said Kevin. "But maybe you could help us defeat Mother Brain."

"No, no, no, no..." Laughed the AVGN. "You're not real...NONE OF YOU ARE REAL!! Tell me this is a nightmare! I've played so many shitty games it's taken such a toll on my mental condition! I have to stop! It was supposed to be a PSA for Simon's Quest....for fun. IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE A WHOLE *vulgarity*ING WEB SERIES!!!"

"What's he talking about?" Asked Lana.

"Maybe he's been probed by Mother Brain." Said Mega Man.

"That crazed cranium has MAXIMUSLY gone too far this time!" Agreed Kid Icarus.

Suddenly, the Nerd started screaming F-bombs and shaking the Power Glove in hopes of getting him back. No avail. Captain N tried to pull him away from him, but he was socked like a lightning bolt by the Nerd's own Power Glove. Then, he darted through the royal halls like an escaped lunatic, screaming profanities here and there.

"I GOT HIM!" Yelled Captain N as he gave pursuit.

The Nerd ran through the dining room and was finally cornered in the kitchen. Before he could run out, Captain N got there first, and blocked his escape. He slammed the door shut and locked it quickly to ensure the crazed Nerd was sealed. He backed away and finally collapsed, on the ground, laughing.

"You're not real! You can't hurt me, you cartoon cock-craver! My fans....THEY BROKE ME!! THEY DID THIS!! THEY ALL DID IT!! I DIDN'T KNOW WHEN TO STOP, AND NEITHER DID THEY!! THEY JUST KEPT DEMANDING AND DEMANDING FOR ME TO EXPLORE THE WORLD OF SHIT!! IT'S HAPPENED!! IT'S FINALLY HAPPENED!! THANKS, FANS! THANKS, VIEWERS! THANKS....READERS!!!"

Captain N hit him in the head with a steamroller in hope of knocking some more sense into him, but he only got more mad. He jumped on top of him and punched him quick and mercilessly like a pissed-off beast. Each blow felt like a brick to the face, especially with a Power Glove involved.

----

Princess Lana was outside, frantically trying to pull the door open.

"Kevin, are you alright??" she yelled, continuing to pull the handle with all her strength.

She pulled harder and harder, sweating bullets and panting heavily as she heard loud clangs of kitchen tools.

"Stand aside, my princess!"

A whip flew outward, coiled itself around the doorknob, and removed it from the wooden board.

"Keys? Simon Belmont doesn't need keys."

When they opened the door, Captain N had the Nerd on the ground, tables and utensils lay everywhere. N turned and noticed them.

"Lana! Guys!"

The Nerd got his chance. He kicked Kevin off of him, grabbed his zapper and fired at the princess, Simon shielding himself in the nick of time and being de-digitized.

"SIMON!!" cried Lana.

Kevin saw this and gave the Nerd a menacing glare.

"You'll pay." Said Kevin.

"YOU brought me here! YOU ruined my life!! YOU SO-CALLED FANS OF MINE BROUGHT ME INTO THIS CLUSTER-*vulgarity*ED PLACE!!"

"It's on!" yelled Kevin. "Everyone! RUN!"

"But, Kevin--"

"GO!! I'll deal with this mad man!"

Kevin threw a small Japanese-style table at the Nerd. It was a direct hit, and trapped him under, too hysterical to escape.

Kevin went over and smooched Lana.

"I've loved you ever since I first came here." He told her as she blushed and smiled, kissing him back before taking off with everyone else.

As Captain N was too zoned out and excited at his newfound relationship, he felt a hard blow to his back as he hit the wall of the dining room, cratering it heavily.

"You done yet?" Yelled the Nerd.

"Now I am." Replied Kevin as he unholstered his Zapper.

The Nerd and the Game Master charged like buffalo, Zapper in one hand, knuckles in the other. Beams flying everywhere, the two champions bellowing for glory.

I think we broke the Nerd.

------------

RIP Electricferret.com

1997-2013

Not to beat a dead horse, but thanks for all your hard work, Serge!

With this wonderful universe gone, I can't write any more open-ended fan fiction. :-(

#2 Callisto

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Posted 23 August 2013 - 12:17 PM

Learn More About
The Angry Video Game Nerd
Read more about The Angry Video Game Nerd at Wikipedia
Official Site: Cinemassacre Links: AVGN wiki Channel Awesome wiki Wikipedia

Captain N: the Game Master
Read more about Captain N: the Game Master at Wikipedia
Official Site: Nintendo Links: Captain N's Wiki page Ultimate Warp Zone The Unofficial Captain N Home Page



#3 DSkillz

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Posted 26 August 2013 - 10:34 PM

Heh, pretty funny set-up. HulkSmashSpammers. :D

 

I know next to nothing about the Angry Video Game Nerd, but given that he seems to be pretty bad at gaming, yet somehow holding his own against Captain N in a brawl, I think he continues to give Kevin a good fight before finally (and probably hilariously) going down. 

 

 



With this wonderful universe gone, I can't write any more open-ended fan fiction. :-(

 

There are other options out there, you know. Check here for a few: 

 

http://www.electricf...eones-eyeballs/



#4 HulkSmashSpammers

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Posted 27 August 2013 - 05:22 PM

Thanks, man! And the Nerd was just having an off-day. Kyle was being a troll.

He has been getting better with gaming, not as bad at least. Definitely funnier. And I can't log into that forum for some reason.

#5 DSkillz

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Posted 28 August 2013 - 12:10 AM

And I can't log into that forum for some reason.

 

You mean this one?

 

http://electricferret.freeforums.net/

 

The one that's linked in the first post of the topic I mentioned earlier? As far as I can tell, you shouldn't have had problems registering or logging in there. Acceptance of newly registered accounts has been automatic so far as I've seen. 

 

You may have tried registering at Haven of Wiidom, a site I mentioned in a later post in that topic.

 

http://z15.invisionf...idom/index.php?

 

New registrations at that site have to be approved by an admin, but the admins haven't really been active there of late. So, you may want to try the former site instead for the time being.



#6 Callisto

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Posted 04 September 2013 - 12:05 PM

Match Final Results
USER RATINGS
Dinsdale Piranha gives it a grade of [A] -
DSkillz gives it a grade of [A] - Just about hilarious!
SCORE
The Angry Video Game Nerd: 3
Captain N: the Game Master: 6
FPA: 4.0





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