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#1 Nihlium

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Posted 12 May 2013 - 02:14 AM

 

200x200xmonochrome.jpg.pagespeed.ic.fy7x

 

 

 

200x25xtitle_background.jpg.pagespeed.ic

The Night Of The Verocorin Attack

 

Gregory pushed through the crowd of reporters and spectators as he tried to reach the center of the crowds attention "Excuse me! Pardon Me!" his mood began to sour as the mob got thicker and more stubborn "Will you MOVE!" he shouted as a wall of photographers formed in front of him. Just as he was about to blow he heard someone shout his name.

 

"Hey Greg, over here!"

 

Gregory's face brightened as he heard the familiar voice "Dr.Vesper!" three police officers cut through the crowd and escorted Gregory to the blood covered doctor "Have you seen my parents Dr.Vesper? I've been to the hospital but they weren't there."

 

Dr.Vesper flipped through a clipboard and shook his head "Sorry Greg, I haven't seen them. Your best bet is to ask one of the medics from the SLJ." he pointed to a cluster people in doctor's coats "Good luck kid."

 

Gregory ran towards the medics and cleared his throat "Sorry to bother you but have you seen either the Grey Duchess or the Monarch?"

 

One of the medics turned his sweat and dirt covered face to Greg and sighed "Relation?"

 

"I'm their son." answered Gregory slightly agitated.

 

The medic ran his finger down his clipboard and when his finger stopped he looked up at Gregory with pity "Follow the yellow tape until you see a large white tent. You'll find them there."

 

Without hesitation Gregory ran off dodging and pushing passed crowds. As he sped through the chaos the top of a large white tent came into view, Gregory smiled as he ran as fast as his feet could carry him. When he finally reached the tent he was met by a tall burly man blocking the entrance "Excuse me sir, I'm here to see my parents, The Grey Duchess and The Monarch."

 

The man moved to the side and opened the tent. He looked at Gregory with sorrow in his eyes "They are at the end of row four."

 

As he slowly walked into the bright tent Gregory's smile shattered. In front of him were rows of bodies on the floor covered in immaculate white sheets "This must be a mistake." he whispered as he walked to the end of the fourth row. He stopped in front of two bodies laying next to each other under one sheet and crouched down next to them. He took a deep breath and slowly inched away the top of the sheet and feel backwards as he saw the scarred face of his father staring back at him.

 

Hot tears ran down his trembling face as he processed the situation in silence. He jumped as he felt a hand touch his shoulder. "It's me Greg." responded the deep voice that belonged to the hand "I got here as soon I could."

 

"They're gone Carlos!" Cried Gregory as he embraced he embraced him "They're dead."

 

"I know bro." shuddered Carlos as he bit back his tears "I know."

 

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Four Days After The Verocorin Attack

 

"I Refuse."

 

"What do you mean you refuse? Do you know how many people pray for this chance Gregory" the SLJ officer was visibly puzzled as he looked at the emotionless teen.

 

"I don't want to enroll at the Sentinel Academy. In fact, I want nothing to do with the Sentinels." Gregory was stony faced as he answered the hoary haired man who sat in the couch in front of him. The living room went eerily quiet as the three men in Whint manor stared at each other

 

The officer turned to Carlos who was standing behind the sofa Gregory was sitting in with an apple in his hand "Carlos, speak some sense into your brother, please."

 

Carlos took a bite out of the apple and looked at the floor "I'm sorry Bill, but his mind is made up." he looked at Bill's surprised face and took another bite from the apple "And so have I. I'm leaving the SLJ."

 

Bill shot out of his seat visibly angry "You can't be serious! Out of all times you choose now to do this? What about your parents, are you just going to throw away everything that they died for!?"

 

Gregory launched out of the sofa and took a step towards Bill "What the hell do you know about our parents, huh?" he ignored the crackling of energy that formed around Billy's hands "They gave up everything for the Sentinels, everything! And what did they get in return? Their name written on some memorial and two days of criticism from the media!"

 

Carlos put his hand on Gregory's shoulder in an attempt to diffuse the situation but was quickly shoved away "Greg calm down."

 

"Forget that Carlos. They dedicated decades to these pompous pricks but when some shit faced journalist start criticizing them what do they do? Nothing! Well I'll be damned if I have anything to do with you bastards again."

 

The energy around the officer's hand dissipated "I understand how you feel, but your parents aren't the only Sentinels under fire fight now. We're doing the best we can."

 

Carlos walked over to front door of the house and opened it "I'm sorry Bill, but we've made up our minds. I'll be over at HQ to make it official."

 

Bill walked over to Carlos and sighed "What will you do?"

 

"Were going to to join the Angels."

 

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A Blast Of Monochrome

x2208.gif.pagespeed.ic.hpYrLRBvjp.png     Psychic Blast: Superior (rank 2)

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Storm City During The Ant-Metahuman Protests

 

The streets of Storm City were flooded with protesters shouting both pro and anti metahuman arguments at each other with only the presence of the KPD keeping them from becoming violent. The voice of one of the leaders of the AMA (Anti-Metahuman Alliance) could be heard blaring on a bullhorn "We need to purge our society from the impure blood of the 'meta-freaks'! If they can't protect us, what other purpose do they serve!?"

 

"NONE!!" Shouted his followers in rabid fervor.

 

Amidst the protesters the Angels Of Mercy patrolled the area ensuring things didn't get out of hand. Gregory and Carlos Whint slowly walked amongst the meta-humans keeping an eye out for any troublemakers.

 

"I don't get it Carlos, why aren't the Sentinels doing this? We should be in Lowtown dealing with the Bottom Girls or the Bolo Gang."

 

Carlos stopped and shook his head "Because, the SLJ is still recuperating. Plus, seeing that they are kind of the reason for this shitstorm, their presence here would only cause more problems."

 

John Reynolds pushed his way out and folded his arms as Gregory and Carlos came into view "Hey you two. Hurry your asses up. Things don't look so good."

 

Gregory stopped in front of John and put his hands on his hips "What do you mean things don't look goo-"

 

The ground shook as a large explosion sent everyone tumbling into one another. As the protesters came out of their collective shock pandemonium erupted as gunfire and varying energy blasts shot across Storm City. War cries from both sides could be heard amongst the screams of pain.

 

"What the hell happened!?" shouted Gregory as he dodged the frantic crowd but he got no answer "Carlos!? Reynolds!?" he pushed through the crowd looking for his allies while keeping his eyes out for stray attacks "This is ridiculous, where are they?"

 

A large horned man burst through a crowd of anti-metahuman protesters screaming on the top of his lungs "Death To Humans!" he turned to Gregory and snarled as he charged towards the teen.

 

Gregory looked for somewhere to escape as the beastly man charged towards him but couldn't move in time "W-wait I'm a meta-human. I'm a...." before he could be hit a man yanked him out of the way throwing to the ground.

 

"You o.k kid?"

 

"Yeah, but we still have a problem." coughed Gregory as he stood up and watched as the large metahuman turned around.

 

"Bullets won't work on him."

 

"Just stay behind me." warned Gregory as the man charged at them again.

 

"Kid, I think we should move."

 

"Don't worry, I have this." Gregory braced himself and released a gray wave of energy that knocked both the metahuman off of his feet "Take this!" another blast of gray energy hit the man sending him flying several feet backwards. Gregory turned to the crowd of people and smiled "Am I good or am I good?"

 

"What you are is a metahuman." answered the man who had saved him as he took out a gun "Sorry kid, but the purge has begun." as he finished speaking all the people behind him pulled guns out.

 

"Wait a minute. I just saved you." Gregory backed away as he heard the sound of guns cocking "I don't want to hurt you." suddenly Gregory was pulled away my an invisible force as he saw the mob fire a wave of bullets where he was standing.

 

Cinereal Command

x2206.gif.pagespeed.ic.NPDrLIeX3r.png     Mind Control: Superior (rank 2)

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Two abnormally large hands stretched and caught Gregory pulling him into a dark alley way. They slowly shrunk as a group of people in red and old clothes emerged from the darkness of alley. The man who had caught Gregory dusted off his hands as he addressed the teen "That was very stupid of you kid. Next time you want to save an animal, make sure it doesn't bite."

 

Gregory placed his hand on his temple and stepped away from the group "Who are you guys?"

 

"Is that how you say thank you kid?" replied Gregory's rescuer "We are fellow metahumans and brethren. That's why we saved you kid, we're family which means we have to protect each other."

 

Gregory slowly lowered his hand as the chaos outside intensified sending vibrations throughout the alley "Family."

 

"Looks like we got company guys." chimed one of the metahumans as a gang of humans entered the alley way with guns pointed at them "Trouble seems to follow you around kid."

 

"Yeah, I realized." Gregory's eyes turned dark gray and the gang of humans collapsed as their noses started to bleed "Humans, they're so fragile." he turned around and cocked his head as they writhed on the ground

 

"Please, Stop!" begged one of the humans as their eyes rolled in their heads "The pain."

 

His head slowly straightened as he spoke "As you wish."

 

The humans trembled as they brought their guns to their heads. They began to beg as their fingers began to tense and then with a bang, silence.

 

"Nice work kid." snickered Gregory's rescuer as he and the gang started to leave the alley "If you get tired of protecting these chimps come to Apogee Towers in Electrum. Alone."

 

Monochrome Monarchy

2209.gif     Illusions: Superior (rank 2)

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The Day After The Anti-Metahuman Protest

 

Carlos paced around the immense living room as he looked at the dark oak floor "Have you lost your mind!?" his fury drenched voice echoed throughout the large house "You want to leave the Angels Of Mercy, fine, be my guest. You want to move out, o.k, you need a little independence." he turned to Gregory with rage dripping off his face "But do you really expect me to allow you to just vanish into some secret cult! Have you lost your freaking mind!?"

 

Gregory gazed at the floor as his brother ranted trying to stay calm "It's not a cult."

 

"Then what the hell is it?! Let me guess, you can't tell me."

 

Gregory stood up, grabbed his bag walked over to his brother and embraced his trembling body as hot tears crept down his face "Carlos, I love you. But I have to go." he released his brother and started walking towards the door as he wiped away his tears. After he finished drying his eyes he was met with his brother standing in front of the door "Carlos, don't do this."

 

Black Butterflies started to appear around Carlos as stinging tears enveloped his eyes "I am not going to allow my little brother to screw his life up! Now drop that bag and sit down."

 

"Carlos, listen to me. I've made up my mind."

 

"I'm the big brother, you need to listen to me!" bellowed Carlos as the butterflies sliced through his surroundings "I'll force you if I have to Greg."

 

"You're not thinking straight Carlos. Don't make do this." a butterfly flew passed his face leaving a scar "Fine." his eyes turned light gray as the color in the house melted away "You forced me Carlos."

 

"Your illusions wont work Greg." shouted Carlos as he felt his feet sink into the floor. He tried to walk towards his brother but his feet were bound by the illusion. He gazed at his brother standing in front of him as his eyes released his tears "I won't allow you to leave."

 

"I already have.' answered Greg as Carlos heard the door close behind him.

 

The Lobby of Apogee Tower Later That Day

 

"I'm glad you decided to come kid" sang the metahuman who had rescued Gregory as he shook his hand vigorously "My name is Picasso. How about you?"

 

Gregory nervously shifted eyes along the decorated walls of the large room almost not realizing that he had been asked a question "Gregory Whint"

 

Picasso chuckled as he let go of Gregory's sweat soaked hand and wiped his palm on his pants "That's not what meant kid. Everyone from the execs at the top to us way down here renounce our birth-names and take up one that truly expresses who we are. So tell me, whats your name?"

 

A feeling of elation infected his body as Picasso's words sank into his brain "Monochrome. My name is Monochrome."

 

Picasso smiled and slightly bowed his head "Welcome to The Creed, Monochrome"

 



#2 Nihlium

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Posted 12 May 2013 - 05:59 PM

Nothing? I guess this one was pretty bad then.



#3 treacherous

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Posted 12 May 2013 - 09:00 PM

Sucks.

(I don't know really. I might read this tomorrow honestly.)

#4 Canis Minor

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Posted 13 May 2013 - 07:21 AM

It's not bad. It's a tad bit generic, but it's written really well, which pretty much makes up for that. Overall, an interesting character. Thumbs up from me.



#5 Nihlium

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Posted 13 May 2013 - 01:23 PM

Thanks. I was a tad bit worried about it being either too generic or too long. Guess I should have added a bit more.



#6 Nihlium

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Posted 14 May 2013 - 11:51 AM

The Creed



#7 The Rookie

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Posted 14 May 2013 - 11:55 PM

You know I was going to make a team like The Creed but I can't get rid of Quinton Imports and Exports.

 

So I guess Felix Friendly just might show up :)



#8 Pseudonym

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 08:12 AM

A team for metahuman superiority? But Khazan has a lot of metahumans already. One of the largest government job opportunities in Khazan is a team of superheros. Metas are already more or less socially superior.

 

Wait... a socially superior team that violently defines their own superiority...

 

I think you may have just set up the Klan.



#9 The Rookie

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 08:48 AM

Hey Pseudo, not to pimp my own shit but check this out, it's sort of my chartacters Manifesto on the meta human condition and addresses the whole thing about super heroes and why they're BAD for meta humans

 

http://www.electricf...ew-best-friend/

 

And yes the wheels are churning, I think Felix will make an appereance.



#10 treacherous

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 11:19 AM

I think you may have just set up the Klan.

 

Which would be a great idea actually.  It worked for Magneto.



#11 Pseudonym

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 11:24 AM

Yo, the Rookie, I love reading your shit and you should pimp it as often as possible. Also, the idea of a strong militant anti-meta human sentiment in Khazan is really strange to me. It feels like metahumans are an essential part of Khazan - with the Bravo Sentinels doing public works and the Alpha Sentinels for the most part keeping the peace. The president of the country is  talking dinosaur. Dunno, it just seems weird to me.



#12 Nihlium

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 01:31 PM

The idea behind The Creed is that humans and metahumans should not be treated equally, The Creed see humans as apes or neanderthals. Humans don't see apes as equals and The Creed believes the same about humans. As for the Sentinels, The Creed believes risking one's life for a human is akin to risking ones life for a chimp.



#13 Pseudonym

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 02:04 PM

Yeah, so like the Klan.



#14 deojusto

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 03:07 PM

Ivan's character Marcellus Dollorosa would make a good counter-balance to these guys. The only main problem is that he's an American, not a khazanian, so they might not come into contact. Anyway, regarding the good old US of A, here's some stuff Ivan wrote that helped me when I wrote a Superhouse fic about meta-powers rights 

 

"You're welcome to use Senator Marcellus Dolorosa (R- New York.) Although he is a villain, it would make more sense for him to be at or near the rally. Also, the world at large does not know anything about his villainous activities- even the now-defunct Jupiter League (this world's Justice Society analogue) just thought he was a man doing the best he could. He appears to be a former hero cop, sidelined by injuries, turned man of the people. While he does secretly torture and murder superheroes in his basement, his public face is one of a champion for human rights. He does vocally support a number of measures your pro-superpowers group would oppose. Although there is plenty of talk and lots of proposals are made, here are the two key pieces of legislation on the floor of Congress which currently address metahuman activity:


1- A bill outlining the institution of a national standard for "meta-crimes" legislation. Currently metahumans who commit crimes are prosecuted more strongly in states that have metahuman censures in place, and normally elsewhere. This bill would make meta crime a distinct classification universally. This is philosophically similar to the real-life justifications for hate crime laws, arguing that metahumans already have a distinct, powerful advantage in life, and therefor a distinct responsibility when it comes to behavior. Obviously, this is unpopular with vigilante metahumans, which makes it all the more popular with the normal folks.

2- a proposed amendment to the Selective Service act which would require all metahumans, regardless of gender, to register for the draft at age 18. It started off as what seems like common sense- if you have a young lady who can punch out tanks and fly at Mach 3, she might make at least as effective a soldier as your average 18 year old male. This is an incredibly sensitive issue, with a lot of eyes watching from all sides. It might even be the impetus for your rally. The pro-amendment camp argue that the measure would conceivably save the lives of thousands of American soldiers, and that, according to the US Government metas DO have "an acknowledged responsibility to use their powers appropriately and for the benefit of mankind" (quoted from an earlier piece of legislation called the Brumitt Bill, which is itself a point of contention for liberal metahumans.) Those who oppose the bill see it as the first step toward metahuman registration, and are holding fast to the "slippery slope" argument."

 

In regards to Pseudo's opinion that a brotherhood of mutants type of deal in khazan would feel weird, I sort of agree. Sort of. It could work great as a character set in an insular world with other characters like itself or dealing with the same issues. But Khazan isn't really intentionally built for that kind of plotline, though you could do it well if you thought about it, you'd just have to be conscious of whether or not it's going to work with every choice you make. 

 

For example, the conflict in X-Men between humans and mutants is clear, there's an us vs them mentality, and one side or another can claim superiority for whatever reason pleases them. But when the skrull show up, the us vs them becomes us and them vs those guys. Then you got guys like spider-man who enter the public fray who are meta, but would he consider himself a mutant? No, he may not fit in either category of us or them. That makes it us vs them and this one guy and others who don't fit the criteria for either.

 

Then you have Gods like Thor, not human and not mutant, not even meta-human even. Then throw in all the vampires of Blade, all magic users, aliens from other planets, people who become meta via accidents or science. The best x men comics are sometimes the ones that don't acknowledge the outside Marvel Universe and assume the major conflict in society is mutants and humans; you may have to do the same with the Khazan universe. 

 

Khazan is like that times ten. For example, who could be a part of the Creed? People with random powers from birth? Sure they probably fit. What about Jennifer Blood? She thinks she's superior to all humans and would probably join an organization that claims that she is superior; yet she's a vampire, and probably wouldn't identify as meta, and would see the Creed themselves as being too human. Same situation for ZombieGirl and Dinas, they aren't human, may feel like they're superior to humans, but they aren't meta. Becki's a ghoul or post-human, and Dinas is an elf, a species totally evolutionarily separate from humans. Would the Creed look down on them? They aren't human, they aren't normal, but it isn't an us vs them mentality anymore either.

 

What about aliens or people from alternate dimensions like Helenas? What about guys who get power from Sayang? What about demons like midnight secret? Would he be not human enough to be in the anti-human group?

 

Meta-humans becomes a super specific broad term when you can't control the origins of everyone else's characters. The Brotherhood of Mutants, for example, was at least inclusive to some degree that anyone who was a mutant wouldn't get excluded. But meta-humans would also include guys like Blade, and I doubt they'd let him join, so mutant was a more exclusive term then meta-human.

 

Don't get me wrong, it's a cool concept and sometimes I just ramble for the sake of rambling, but the definition of meta-human may not fit every encounter.       

 

  



#15 deojusto

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 03:07 PM

Wow that was long. 



#16 Pseudonym

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 03:14 PM

In regards to Pseudo's opinion that a brotherhood of mutants type of deal in khazan would feel weird

 

I'm not saying that it would be too weird to work. And DON'T LET THIS STOP YOU from creating ideas like this in the future. It's just accepting this idea into ""canon"" is a little bit hard. It was really cool to read and I enjoyed it. But if there was a group like the Creed, everyone would hate them. Everyone. Like the Klan. 

 

I was saying they'd have to be a more underground, hit-and-run group of assholes who occasionally kill a human or something and leave some MetaSuperiority message. But the Sentinels would hate them, most Angels of Mercy would hate them, most MetaHumans would hate them, most humans would hate them.

 

On the otherside too, a protest against metahumans makes no sense when the president is a dinosaur and the second runner up was a psychic psychopath.



#17 Nihlium

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 04:38 PM

@deo: The Creed is supposed to be an international organization so interaction would not be impossible.

 

@psuedo: The current form of the Creed is a clandestine organization and only conspiracy theorist will probably believe they still exist (sort of like the illuminati). Considering the current climate in the U.S.A (in the real world) I don't think a metahuman protest would be impossible even in a place like Khazan with a "metahuman" president. Also I don't The Creed would call Dr. Velocity a true metahuman but that is up for debate.



#18 deojusto

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 06:12 PM

If I wanted to make a Creed character, what would you define as meta-human, and not?



#19 Nihlium

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 06:40 PM

The team is open to any type of character as long as they are "real" metahumans. Which means no mythical races (although if they can have powers that grant mythical/magical like powers like Mobius from spiderman or Scarlet Witch.) no technologically enhanced/aided beings unless the tech is used to aid in controlling natural power and no aliens or extra-dimensional beings.



#20 Darkender

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Posted 15 May 2013 - 09:19 PM

I like the idea, but Doc Velocity is a huge hole in it. If it was me, I'd have the group start somewhere else and have them focus on Khazan simply because it has a high metahuman population. That may make it more plausible. 






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