Buck Rogers and Wilma Deering
Starbuck and Athena
In the realms of robot smashing, alien crashing and dare-devil piloting, few double-teams can compete with these two.
Buck Rogers and Wilma Deering: Representing Earth's 25th Century defense forces. Often badly out-manned and out-gunned their single-seat fighter escapades have saved the planet more than once. Whether fighting Space Pirates or the full Draconian Armada, these two pull off the stunts that make the enemy weep with frustration.
Starbuck and Athena: Representing the last Battlestar, The Galactica. Scraping for their very lives in a helter-skelter dash across the galaxy, their single-seat fighter abilities keep the Galactica intact. Despite the overwhelming man and material strength of the Cylon Empire, it is the unmatched piloting skill of the Colonials which keep the Galactica one step ahead.
When an amazing series of events brings the Galactica to 25th Century Earth with the entire Cylon Empire on their tail, things look grim. When the Draconian Armada appears to reinforce the Cylons against the Humans, it truly becomes the Last Stand.
In this final Battle Royal for the human race, many will make the ultimate sacrifice... including maybe the greatest heroes from both sides. Who gives their lives and who survives this bloody conflict? Of course the Bad Guys never win these things, but there is usually a teary funeral for some hero at the end.... reserve your lilies now.
Join us now for a battle we had to call...
THE SPORTS BOX
PAT: Whoa! Jay, what was that! I felt a sudden lurch.... almost as if a million souls had suddenly cried out in terror and had been suddenly silenced. Or was that my lunch?
JAY: I don't know but the console is still clean, so it wasn't your lunch hurling. Kosh, what happened?
Kosh: Something is not right. We don't belong here, we must leave!>
PAT: All the more reason to stay, in my opinion. Whoa... geeze!!!! There's blaster fire everywhere... My God!!
Ships Captain: Full Shields! Evasive Maneuvers!
JAY: Jumping blue catfish! Oh god, I can't believe that I just said that. Ahem!! The Leick is caught in the middle of two warring fleets!
We're trying to identify the various players involved... Say Pat, isn't that the Earth laying off our starboard side?
PAT: Hey yeah! The Earth is under attack!!!
Kosh: The Earth you see is not the Earth you know.
JAY: Wait a sec, I'm getting some information on the two warring fleets through our Khazan database. The attacking ships consist of Draconian and Cylon vessels...
PAT: Draconia and Cylon... Hmmm. Well, let me put two and two together real quick...
Fleeing at maximum warp from Unicron after last battle, we fell into some kind of interstellar anomaly. The anomaly has sucked us into a strange alternate universe where a battle for the Earth is about to begin.
Jay, I think we have a job to do. Live from Planet Earth we have an amazing match for you today! Hello and Welcome, I'm Pat Summers.
JAY: And I'm Jay Peoples. We have for you now a massive battle for the planet Earth... er... well, an alternate dimension Earth, anyway.
A massive fleet of Cylon and Draconian ships against a smaller formation of Earth defenders...
25th Century Earth Defense Forces and Colonial Forces. The Galactica is in the heat of the battle.
PAT: Indeed. The action is already thick out there. While we bet a better on this, let's take a look at what you might have said if you were here.
Favorite letter of the Week
An interesting contest, but rather biased against the Colonials in respect of their team members. Buck and Wilma are worthy representatives of Earth, and Starbuck would have to be in any line-up featuring the Colonies' best, but who the frak chose Athena? She's _bridge_ personnel (or even a teacher[!]), not a fighter pilot! Yes, she's flown a Viper, but she wasn't all that good at it, even if she did show a distinct proclivity for being in close formation with ol' Bucko.
No, she's not a good choice. For a true match of the best against the best, it's have to be Apollo partnering Starbuck, or Boomer. If there's some PC reason why it has to be one male and one female in each team, then what about Sheba? She's an experienced Warrior who's managed to bounce both Apollo and Starbuck, so she'd be perfect. Even Dietra would be a better choice than Athena!
Of course, C.O.R.A. would be even better....
Actually, the female half is the weak spot in each team. Wilma, for all her combat experience, is a product of her time and relies much too much on computers. Buck has shown her that human skill can do the job, and win, but does she really believe it deep down? We'll see....
So, this battle could well be more like a 1v1 than a pairs fight, with both women being wingmates rather than fully active combatants. That being the case, Starbuck's experience ought to tell. Buck's a great pilot, but so is Starbuck, and he has much more combat time.
In particular, he's more used to using the Viper as an FTL fighter. Prior to the Searcher mission, Earth Defense Directorate fighters didn't do much flying at FTL speeds, using Stargates to get from system to system; Vipers, by contrast, spend much of their time FTL, so the Colonial equivalent of the Picard Maneuver will be second nature to their crews. Buck may have a hard time working out where his opponents are, much less getting a firing solution!
Strategy-wise, it's gridiron vs. triad, and the Colonial game is more suited to an contest of teams of two. So my vote goes to the Colonials, even though Starbuck will be doing all the work on his own!
Captain Freedom writes:
This one's actually pretty hard to call. Buck and Starbuck (gosh, what macho names) are pretty evenly matched as pilots. If it was a shootout or a poker game, I'd have to go Starbuck. Hand to hand or disco dancing with christmas lights would be Buck all the way. So it really comes down to the ladies. Athena (another really good name) is a good pilot, but she's also fairly inexperienced. Wilma (definitely short-changed in the great name department) has the training and experience to take her out fairly quickly. Once Athena's out of the way, Wilma's skills can probably break the deadlock between Buck & Starbuck.
Ok Starbuck and Athena will win because Starbuck started a major chain of coffee shops and what did Duck Dogers ever do? besides star in 2 Looney Tunes episodes. Second Athena is way hotter than that other girl!
Buck and Wilma are the ones to make it back. Why? Because Starbuck was stranded on a desert planet in the series with a Cylon, who later became his friend, saving him (Starbuck)from his fellow Cylons, getting destroyed in the process. So, as a Cylon was once his friend, Starbuck might lose the wish to fight, afraid of killing another Cylon . You don't believe me? Remember Romeo and Juliet (well, I'm not implying love here, but...)? Because they were of opposing families, they lost their enthusiasm for the battle. So what if Starbuck lost his? Then he'll be the reason that both me and Athena get the Kentucky Fried Chicken Treatment(TM). Well, so much for Battlestar Galactica. Buck will be too busy defending his own starfleet. Ouch!
The amazingly similar pictures of those two duos is kind of scary...and I'd say its a good representation of just how closely matched they really are.
In the end though...it comes down to this...After a quick scan of the posters, Buck and StarBuck both look basically equal when it comes to competence. Now lets look at the ladies, they both have that hands on hips stance, Athena looks like a 'babe thrown in just cause she's a babe' look (with the wind in her hair and all...I mean its so obvious) Now Wilma on the other hand, looks like she's got some attitude, and above all, like she really doesn't want to be in that poster.
In conclusion, I'm not someone to actually research a topic when I don't know much about it so I'm giving the win to Buck and Wilma.
Lt. Brie, Red Squadron writes:
Starbuck and Athena are survivors; they survived the destruction of the Colonies, they made it through the battle of Kobol (which is more than could be said for Serina, who bore an uncanny resemblance to Jane Seymour). And they've helped the ragtag, fugitive fleet make it through one disaster after another. The Battlestar Galactica crew has faced far greater dangers than Buck and Wilma have ever faced, and managed to survive. Starbuck is one of the best pilots of the Galactica, and Athena has proven herself to be a 'Jill of all trades' (for lack of a better term), as she's not only a pilot but a bridge officer/technician. All in all, I think Starbuck and Athena have the necessary toughness needed to survive. (Mind you, I am judging this basically by the 'moods' of their respective series; BG tended to be darker than the lighthearted Buck Rogers, hence its heroes had to be tougher).
Bsg was not a ripoff of Star Wars. In fact It predates star wars in it's conception. The studios Funded it then because of star wars sucess. anyways On to the fight. I would say that they would get along really well. But if they had to fight. and skill of piloting Vs etc. Athena is not a fighter pilot. Both Starbuck and buck are good pilots. It'll be a draw. Unfortunately since I like BSG better I gotta vote for them.
The thing that will matter in this match is A-TEAM! Starbuck could get the A-Team with him, and kick Bucks ass.
Lets compare the participants in this extravaganza of heroism by analyzing the facts...
Its true that the ships themselves are pretty much equal. Both are beam weapon speed demons with no real shielding. They both also augment the skills of the pilots over time because the pilots are reliant on their own experience for survival.
I believe that Starbuck and Athena have seen more combat and derived more of a benefit. The Colonials are constantly under the gun. Buck and Wilma though highly trained in space combat seem to see more action on the ground especially in the later episodes where they are on the Searcher. So I say that Starbuck and Athena have seen more combat.
A blatant disadvantage for Starbuck and Athena is the fact they aren't really partners. Starbuck and Apollo are partners. Whereas, Buck and Wilma are partners. They can rely on knowing just what the other is thinking. Starbuck and Athena have a professional military camaraderie, but not the mental link.
Lets bring the enemies into this, Cylons vs. Draconians. Cylons are silicon-based life forms. The Centurians are designed purely for combat. They are calculating and follow orders specifically. They never flee. The Draconians are essentially humanoids with human flaws and strengths. Its carbon-based vs. silicon-based. I say that the Cylons make the stronger enemy. They hate humanity and are driven by plotting masters. The Cylon leadership may be the races weak link in the grand scheme, but not on the battlefield. The Draconians are purely into it for political expansion. Advantage is to the Colonials.
Another thing to consider, the Galactica has finally made it to Earth. They are not going to be lax. They are going to pull out all stops. They may even sacrifice the Galactica, but they will still find a way to live. In Sports terms, they will be in the Zone. Once in the Zone, you can do little wrong.
Lastly, I can see Buck and Wilma sacrificing their lives to save the Earth. It is the heroic Buck Rogers thing to do. He will go down in a blaze of glory. Wilma loves him dearly (boo...hiss...I know ^_^) and she will follow him watching his back to the end. The name of Buck Rogers will live on as The BattleCry of Earthly Independence.
Let's see what we've got here:
On the one hand we have a daring swashbuckler from the 20th Century stuck in the 23rd who has the chance of a life time: No one will ever be able to drench up any of those atrocious pictures of him with bell bottoms and platform shoes! This guy has everything to live for!
Starbuck on the other hand not only has to come home to that annoying kid and his half-mut-half-machine-unpotty-trained mongrel. This guy not only has a reason for suicidal tendencies, but the motivational factors to go along with it.
Final Analysis: Starbucks flies right into the mothership with some really kicking tunes in the background (and one of those three-eyed chick on his side)
DamieN Brimstone writes:
This sure is a close call, but my gut says to go with Buck and Wilma to survive. The reason is simple, Star Viper pilots have a VERY repetitive series of maneuvers. If I didn't know better, I'd swear that the makers of Battlestar Galactica reused the same space combat footage over and over throughout the show's brief run. Of course that couldn't be, so it must be poor training. Bottom line, once the smack begins to fly, both teams will rack up unbelievable kill counts. But in the end, Buck and Wilma fly off to the 2nd star to the right whilst the Galactica gang has been blown into more pieces than Hal-9000 could count in a day.
Starbuck and Athena are way cooler then Buck Rogers and whatever her name is. I say this because they were based on Star Wars, so it's pretty cool and Star Wars is cool. Not to in fact mention Athena is way hotter then that one other chick.
Oh, GAWD, you guys sure scraped the bottom of the barrel for this one! I say to hell with them all! We should just feed them to the Shadows and wipe our hands of both these lame-@$$ 70's shows. GO CYLONS!!
Starbuck is gonna kick Roger's tail. I mean, Buckyboy managed to save the planet time and again with the whole of earth's resources behind him. What did Galactica have? One Battlestar. Formidable yes, but against an entire fleet?? Starbuck surely has racked up more kills. And Buck Rogers has a tendency to board enemy craft and crack heads in person, meanwhile Starbuck shoots the engine and blows up whole ship.
Really if look at this scenario long enough the out come is quite obvious: Who are the target audience of these shows? Male teenagers to young adults age 13 to 33. What does this audience like to see, WOMEN!!! Demographics can't lie. Wilma and Athena are to hot chicks who no one wants to see killed off, they will win or should I say "survive the turkey shoot" (admit it the Cylons couldn't hit a broad side of a barn if they tried, all they are cannon fodder and the Draconians aren't skilled pilots either). I afraid to say it will be the two bucks that are going to buy the farm and get the nice little token funeral at the end of the show. Starbuck and Rogers will take each other out in the end, after the opposition has been defeated, because both rightly fear the other will move in on "their" girl at the victory party later. After the funerals Wilma will marry Lorne Green and Athena vica versa with the Doc. and everyone will be happy. Demographics don't lie!
Buck and Wilma in the closest thing to a draw the future may ever see. This should be a great match. I just want to see what everyone else has to say. At the time I write this comment the vote was 86 - 87. Buck has been a hero since God was a boy and Battlestar Galactica was another all time favorite of the masses. Can Tweeky be allowed as a second in Buck's corner? Wasn't Cassopiea some hot babe? Wasn't Lorne Greene selling Alpo on the bridge? Bah... Ancient history... Start the fight NOW! I want to see if Wilma still has the body of a model.
Sage of Halo writes:
I say that Starbuck's ship and mission is about TOTAL WARFARE!! Buck's ship and mission deals with skirmishes, therefore I say Starbuck wins.
I see it happening like this. A battle royal is blooming around Earth as Cylon and Draconian ships try to find the opening in the planetary defense shield. All of the competitors are happily blowing away Cylon Raiders and Draconian Marauders. Suddenly, in the midst of the carnage, Buck Rogers' starfighter takes a hit. Since he's a hit, it's only crippled, not destroyed. Princess Ardala, as infatuated with Buck as ever, turns the Draconian forces against the Cylons in order to rescue him (just as well, the Cylons would have betrayed the Draconians eventually anyway). The combined forces of Earth, Galactica, and Draconia repel the Cylon attack and discover they must join forces against the continued threat of the Cylons. End result, victory because of Buck's studliness (none of the heroes died).
Besides, Erin Gray is the hottest woman of the 70's.
Maskim Xuul writes:
As between these two Star Wars clones, I gotta go with the Battlestar Galactica crew. Athena is cuter and Starbuck has better outfits. Be nice to see some Cylon action again, too.
While I was barely out of my diapers when the shows were around but it's gotta be Buck. This guy did just about everything that Star didnít. Besides it's those robots that made Battlestar popular not him. That and I'll do Wilma *purrr* over Athena any day.
Those were some nice images for your battle page there, fellas. Damn nicer than either of these show's cinematography (yeah, yeah, I can't spell). In fact, how the hell did you artists dude touch those photos so nice? You all deserve reverence and respect since all of the celluloid is probably is probably rotting on the vine right now. Makes me pretty darn glad you did that sort of thing.
Huh? Vote? Oh yeah! That would be Starbuck and (*yum*) Athena! They kick more arse, and quite frankly they got more to lose. So those buggers would fight to the last!
Besides once Starbuck gets to earth I can hook him up with this ol' colonel, a black dude with a mohawk, and, their pilot. It'll be a blast!
Editors Note: All the graphics on the site are done in Corel 8. The "Poster" were made out of multiple images layered together.
Sailor Xena writes:
I picked Starbuck and Athena for two reason's. One is that I liked "Battlestar Galactica" better than "Buck Rogers of the 25 Century". Starbuck is an ace pilot and Athena is better looking then Wilma. They will outclass and out pilot Buck and the colonial. Starbuck will win hands down.
"Buck" and "Starbuck?" Are these guys related or something? Sounds pretty suspicious to me. I mean, really, what are the odds of two people with THIS much in common?
I'm sorry, but I just can't see the bad guys teaming up on this one. In theory, either fleet could wipe the good guys out on its own, (if not for our heroes, of course,) and both are destructive, star-conquering races. Seems to me that they'd look at the good guys' equipment, look at the fleet of their "ally," and then simultaneously double-cross one another in the heat of battle. In a battle like that, humanity is bound to win out b/c the other two will waste the bulk of their forces on one another, allowing the token small force of heroes to take out their flagships. Even assuming that the villains DO keep the peace, humanity still has the subtle upper hand b/c they both know that they will be facing off against one another later on and neither one wants to risk losing more troops than the other in this battle and thus have a disadvantage in the next.
Anyway, I went with Buck Rogers for two reasons; first, the setting is his home system, so he knows the "terrain" better; and second, because I'm more familiar with his character than I am Starbuck. Really, though, this seeming Armageddon is probably the best thing for both sides, since both enemy fleets are going to be significantly weakened, Earth gets the use of a Battlestar for its defenses, and the crew of the Galactica get some long-term shore leave.
BL00D ANGEL writes:
All I gotta say is Buck Rogers! Why? 'Cause I grew up w/ him that's why! I may not remember much of him, except that there were a lot of orange things.(got that from an ol lunchbox)
Besides, where do you think Duck Dogers came from. The Warner Bros. Kick Ass and if they have to bite of Buck Rogers, then, I guess Buck Rogers kicks ass. As for the opponents, I've never heard of them in my life. I probably have, but didn't care because they must lose against BUCK ROGERS!
Robotech Master writes:
Since these two starfighters are facing two enemy fleets and not each other, it will come down to skill and luck. Unfortunately, both teams have all of those qualities. Both have the determination to defend, and both have equal starfighters, but I believe Starbuck and Athena will come out alive. They have kept that hunk of junk (Battlestar Galactica) intact way too many times. I doubt they will let anything happen to it now. Personally, since both teams are going up against two fleets, I think both fighters are screwed. However, if one has to come out, it will be Starbuck and Athena.
Wow, this is a strange one!! Battle of the Saturday morning B-rated sci-fi series. Ah, the joy of turning my mind to mush with such classic TV fare as "Land of the Lost", "Space 1999", "Battlestar Galactica" and "Buck Rogers"!!
This is how I see things going down. First, the incredibly lame Cylons (maybe they are "Heralds of Galactus" as well!!) chase the Battlestar Galactica through some sort of space/time anomaly (hopefully killing off Captain "Help I'm Lost" Janeway and her ship of misfit losers along the way!!).
Meanwhile, back in Real Space/Time: the Valiant Defenders of Earth piloting the Earth Defense Star Fighter are preparing to defend against the invading Draconian Armada, only this time, they know that they will lose (outnumbered 10,000 to 1, the Evil Aliens are using biological weapons, etc.).
Just as the battle between the Earth Defense Force and the Draconians is joined a massive rip in the Space/Time continuum deposits the Battlestar Galactica, the Entire Cylon Fleet (should be several thousand), and assorted pieces of Voyager wreckage.
Suddenly there are 4 players in this battle royal. The puny Battlestar will launch all of their Vipers to battle. The Earthers will launch all of their fighters. The Cylons and the um, oh yeah Draconians do the same. Million of fighters zipping like bees amongst colossal warships dealing death and fury.
Out of this hellish dogfight, 4 fighters seem to be doing more damage than all others combined. Quick points (a little late): Pat/Jay come on, the Viper sucks. It is good for close range laser fights and has excellent handling and acceleration, but can't take a hit, has no range and no missiles. The Earth Ship looks cooler and while not as quick or maneuverable, should be able to lock on and zap those Vipers from long range.
Buck Rogers. He's old. I feel old. He lives.
Wilma, she's cute. I like cute, she lives.
Starbuck. He makes coffee. I like coffee. He lives.
Athena. Don't remember her (she is quite the raven haired lass!), but I do remember Apollo. They both have dark hair and "A" names. Theory, Apollo is Athena's brother, or... (but it was the late 70's and I don't think they would show "socially conscious" TV programming at 11:00 Saturday morning.) I liked Apollo even when I was a kid, he lives and so does his cute sis.
THE BATTLE The Cylons die by the billions.
The Draconians die by the trillions.
The Battlestar buys it killing off that Lorne Green/Adama fellow.
The Earth forces lose whatever crappy ship that stupid looking robot is on. BEDE-BEDE-BEDE this you crappy little plot device(I mean it looked like the youngest kid from "8 is Enough", and that necklace thingie!)
At the end of the battle, when all the wreckage is cleared, they find the little kid and his robot dog-thing from the Galactica. Buck goes postal on the kid and dog (Buck hates dogs). Starbuck tries to stop him, but Buck's just too fast on the draw. Three laser blasts later, Starbuck is leaking coffee, I mean blood all over the dead kid and dead robo-dog. The two chicks get in a cat fight, and then realize that Buck was only doing what had to be done. That dog-thing HAD to die. Apollo shows up and congratulates Buck on a job well done. He had always had it in for Starbuck dating his sister, anyway.
Apollo and Wilma hook up, Athena and Buck hook up. The world is saved, but without any coffee, they kill themselves in fits of early-morning depression within a week. The Cylons and the Draconians WIN. BWAHAHAHAHA!!
Chris Sawler writes:
Buck and Wilma all the way on this one guys. Starbuck and Athena had their chance to save everybody in a massive space shootup in the first episode, and look what happened there. Every Battlestar but Galactica gets blown to bits. They couldn't handle it then, they can't handle it now. Buck and Wilma on the other hand, have already stopped the entire Draconian Armada once, twice will be a piece of cake. Buck and Wilma save the day, before Starbuck and Athena even get out of their launch tubes and turbo into the fight.
Josh Wilhoyte writes:
I love both teams but you just gotta know, its Buck Rogers, in the 25th Century. The man will win, he will always win. He'll end up aboard the head Draconian cruiser, trick the Princess into attacking the Cylons and let the two of them battle it out. After all, when the Cylons are done with Earth, the Draconians are next. Now, I doubt Wilma will be all that useful in this battle, but Buck will be doing the whole strategy thing, winning the war while Starbuck and Athena are out winning battles. All three of them should live (Wilma can too, she's okay, but if ya gotta loose someone . . . ). And when they get back home, the conquering hero Buck will welcome them all back to earth. There ya go
I'd have to give this one to Buck and Wilma, simply because these two are the least derivative characters in the contest. I see Starbuck and Athena slowly fading away a la back to the future once they meet Buck and Wilma - Buck Rogers is the ARCHETYPE, and StarBuck is a cheesy clone, ranking up there with . . . some other rip off that I can't think of right now. On another level entirely - who would YOU rather have survive: Erin Gray, or whatís her face Athena?
Geez! I'm glad this ain't a babe match or I'd never decide but since the dudes are involved too, I gotta give it up for Starbuck. This guy defines space swashbuckling, Han Solo knock-off or not. He would waste that fat slob of a Buck Rogers and then be back to Galactica in time to score with both chicks! Go Starbuck! And C'mon! The Colonial Vipers were the thing that came out of BG that actually looked like something cool outta Star Wars! Those ships rocked. Period. What was Buck using? A Frisbee with fins?
What we're doing here is picking the lesser of two evils. Two heroes hafta die... and in the end, they will be the ones who have public schools named after them (to steal a concept from Deep Impact) , and the survivors will be revered, but to a lesser extent. So I gotta go with Starbuck & Co. to survive. If Buck is ever to die, it'd have to be while saving the planet, with all the bells and whistles to go with it.
Even with Buck Roger's paunch beergut, he's got enough gumption to pilot circles around Starbuck. Put Wilma Deering in the picture and you have an unstoppable force against any threat.
Besides, Starbuck and Athena would be too busy admiring themselves in their spaceship's rearview mirror to pay attention to any space battle. Plus, the ground crew of the Galactica would be unable to assist them with their flight path since they would be busy dealing with the infringement suit reopened by Fox Studios. The Viper ships were designed by John Dykstra, who would have to recall them back to the mothership to save his ass from the most evil man in the galaxy, Rupert Murdoch.
Buck would blast the alien force to smithereens, come home to one of the scantily-clad space-bunnies waiting for him,
Meanwhile, Wilma would be so jealous she would travel back into time just to get away from Buck. She'd head out to the Old West and kick Dr Quinn Medicine Woman's butt...so there would be no Athena to begin with!
Ambush Bug writes:
Buck and Wilma by a mile. Why? Strength of a warrior is based on the variety of experience he fights with. Aside from Wilma being hotter, the chick sidekicks are fairly inconsequential here. The real news is in the guys.
Buck: 20th Century AND 25th Century. A ship that goes faster than light using those Stargates (so varied opponents throughout the galaxy). And a kickass avian buddy to call for help.
Starbuck: Mostly a Cylon fighter. His little ship seems WAY slow in comparison (as fast as our slowest brother). And his backup? The tactically static Apollo.
Starbuck's one huge point in his world is that he's a rebel, a little different from the button down fleet. Yeah, well that's diddly compared to the future's only old style Chicago rough rider. He was unconventional in the OLD unconventional world.
Much as I like Buck and Wilma, gotta' go with Starbuck an' Athena on this one... They've got those ROYALLY Cool leather jackets. Both pilots' helmets are lame, but that jacket off-sets any minuses to the Galactica crew. And the Galactica was commanded by Lorne Green... the guy was the spokesman for Alpo. I LOVE Alpo! REAL Meat by-products... none of that Cornmeal Dry Dog-food Crap ... in a thick savory sauce... h-h-h-huhhhh....*shiver... drool* .....
Sorry, what were we talkin' 'bout?
JAY: Our Captain has now safely moved the Leick out of the battle and we are monitoring the communication channels of the two forces...
We just located Colonel Wilma Deering, one of 25th century Earth's finest. She is leading a large wing of Earth fighters against a massive formation of Cylon Raiders.
PAT: Look over there... on the other side of the action, Jay. A mixed flight of Vipers and Earth Defense Starfighters weaving through Draconian Marauder fighters into the very teeth of the massive Draconia flagship itself!
Three great heroes are piloting into the teeth of it... Buck Rogers, Starbuck and Athena.
JAY: They're fighting and maneuvering their fighters through a gauntlet of Draconia attack ships. I can only guess what they might have in mind, it's suicide!
Three lone fighters against the combined force of the massive Draconia and her defense squadrons?!
PAT: It's a hairball suicide run towards the Draconia as... wait... The Vipers are peeling out as Buck Rogers has... apparently... been given permission to dock in the Draconia. What strange events are transpiring here? Meanwhile...
JAY: Wilma's squadron crashes head on with the Cylons forces! Dodging, weaving, blasting! ... Pilots on both sides spin and wheel in the deadly dance which ends with a clear shot at their opponents... So far the humans are out flying the Cylons, but the Cylons out numbering the humans 3 to 1! Wait... Now Draconian cruisers moving up to menace the Earth forces too...
PAT: God, this is exciting stuff! Let's go to our own Sideline Commentator Kosh for this view on the battle..
Kosh: These Cylons are creatures of destruction. Mindless. Cruel. Without remorse. They must be dealt with harshly.
PAT: Thank you, Kosh. What have you got, Jay?
JAY: Pat, two Draconian cruisers have broken through the thin line of Earth Defense forces.... and it looks like they're making a go at the Galactica!
PAT: Jay, we gotta break now to look in on Buck Rogers. Buck is being dragged to the chambers of the Draconian Princess, Ardala. Boy, that Tiger Man character is hauling him like a sack of green taters, but what card is being played....?
JAY: I think Tiger Man is enjoying it too much. I hope Buck has a cool plan or something because Tiger Man is looking for an excuse to off him.
PAT: You got that right... and speaking of offing somebody, check out that amazing maneuvering!! Starbuck sweeps between two Draconian Marauders, drawing their lines of fire into each other... Double Kill, Double Prizes!!
JAY: And Athena, not wishing to be out done, maneuvers around a Draconia cruiser finding a blind spot... her Viper spits laser-fire into it's underbelly! It felt that hit! Not good enough for the kill, though. Pat, more cruisers and more fighters are over-running the defenders lines... and the Galactica is the only thing big enough to challenge them. Looks bad.
PAT: Buck Rogers has been thrown down at the knees of Princess Ardala. She sure looks smug.
JAY: You follow Buck and I'll keep an eye on the action outside. Wilma is leading her squadron to relieve some pressure off the besieged Galactica. Starbuck and Athena are quickly joining her. Apollo's entire Blue squadron with some supporting earth fighters are managing to keep a good portion of the fighters and advancing Baseships at bay... but for how long?
PAT: Buck is allowing the Princess to gloat over him. She appears to believe that Buck has given-up hope on the doomed Earth and has come seeking protection for his miserable life. Not our man Buck Rogers... something else must be up.
JAY: Things are getting incredibly heated in earth's orbit. Wilma, Starbuck and Athena are killing the enemy fighters as fast as they can... Starbuck and Athena, with several Vipers, have just managed the destruction of a cruiser. Wilma's squadron is directing their efforts upon another...
PAT: Buck Rogers has risen to his feet... he's ... he's... Oh My. He's playing tonsil hockey with the Princess.
JAY: Geez! The world is coming to an end and Buck still can find the time to make out! Anyway, the defenders are just barely holding on. The Galactica is taking a pounding from the multitude of attacking single-seat fighters. Wilma's squadron is circling around for another run on the cruisers... Those are the priority.
PAT: And Buck is making another run on the Princess! Sheesh, even Tiger Man looks embarrassed. Oh, wait... he appears to be telling her something, and producing a data file. Hmmm... A datafile with colonial inscriptions on it.
JAY: Wilma Deering's fighter has taken a hit!! She's spinning out of control!!! My God, man! It looks like her ship is about to explode! Why isn't she ejecting? Why?! Wilma keeps fighting for control... She straightens out her crippled fighter... aiming it at the enemy cruiser! Noooooo!!!!!
Draconian Ship: Ka-BOOOM!
PAT: The Draconian Princess turns her back on Buck Rogers! Suspecting a trick, she orders Tiger Man to take him away!
JAY: Pat, I hope I saw Wilma ejecting at the last second... Oh, the sacrifice!! Athena, Starbuck and the remaining Earth defenders draw heart from the play, and redouble their efforts. They drive at the advancing enemy lines with new fury!
PAT: Jay, Buck Rogers is making some sort of impassioned plea. Some sort of last word of reason as Tiger Man drags him from the royal presence... Wait... the Princess has stopped them leaving! She has taken the disk from Buck.
JAY: The battle has degenerated into pure chaos. There is no more fleet formation or coordinated actions. The battle is now boiling down to the actions of the individual pilots. Athena and Starbuck have winged-up together and are blasting the enemy in wild attack sweeps....
PAT: The Princess is viewing Colonial records on the Cylons! Accounts of their murderous machine logic and intentions. She has hit the comm button on the console and is roaring commands to her Fleet Admiral....
JAY: This is a sight! The Draconia just turned her guns on Cylons Raiders! Oh, the Cylon Supreme Commander is going to be extremely pissed.... for a machine, anyway.
PAT: Amid rapid communications of intention, the entire Draconian host has turned to hit the Base Stars... leaving the entire combined Colonial and Earth fleet to concentrate on the cut-off Raider squadrons. I think the Cylons are in trouble...
JAY: Yeah, maybe... but they are gonna make sure they take somebody down with them... Look!
PAT: The Cylons are concentrating everything they've got against the Draconia!
JAY: The Draconia is wounded... no... it's worse...
PAT: Marauders are sweeping laser death upon the Cylon Base Stars... They're going to blow... but too late... !!!
JAY: The Draconia...!
PAT: Oh, Poor Buck.
JAY: Poor Princess.
THE FINAL VOTE
Buck and Wilma: 295
Starbuck and Athena: 377
Total number of people who wrote in to say
Starbuck was going to get Mr. T and the A-Team to help kick Buck Rogers' Ass: 6
THE WRAP UP
PAT: It will be a Heroes Funeral.
JAY: Yes. Yes it will.
PAT: From 25th Century Earth, this has been Pat Summers.
JAY: And Jay Peoples. Good night, all.
PAT: Now that's over, how do we get back home?
Pictures for this weeks big fight came from:
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century Website.
Galacta-Chrome: Battle Star Galactica Scans.
DISCLAIMER / NOTICE:
Buck Rogers (TM) is the property (c) of (?)
Battlestar Galactica (TM) is the property (c) of (?)
This webpage makes no claims and attempts no infringement... this is just for fun.