SLUG: The two heroes swim toward Renraw Snibor. "Swim" is such a pathetic word to describe how graceful these two are in this environment. Upon approaching the city, they are greeted by a virtual army of web-footed aliens!
What's your take on this, Ferret?
FERRET: Key words like "web-footed", Slug. That term only applies to things that get or are wet. I think my feet are growing webs. I'm not getting paid enough for this. Princess Ariel better be a fox or I'm outta here.
SLUG: Uh, Princess Ariel is 12. A foxy 12, but 12 nonetheless. I see that Aquaman and the Sub-Mariner have decided to attack the aliens head on, using super-speed and strength. They're holding their own, for now, but sheer
numbers are going to be a factor for the alien side!
FERRET: This is becoming a worse deal every minute. I'm starting to look like a prune and for what? A couple of fast swimmers, a few bad guys and a 12 year old. I'm beginning to think weasels may be involved.
SLUG: What's this? Octopi, whales, sharks, marine life of all types are attacking the aliens from the rear! Aquaman has stopped fighting and is apparently directing the attack! The Sub-Mariner, however, seems to prefer the
hands on approach. He's pounding alien flesh!
FERRET: Octopi? Is that a real word? Who talks like that? Anyway, hey, the aliens are in full retreat. Talk about your basic flaming cowards. A few marine animals and they run away. Thanks, Slug, are we done now, can I
SLUG: No, my shriveled-skinned compadre, we're not done and you can't go. The two contestants are now heading for the Caves of Terrag the Ugly. Look, there's Tigershark, now! Wow, what a response! Before T.S. knew what hit
him, Aquaman nailed him with his hook-thingie!
FERRET: Finally, that was cool! Death and destruction. My kind of battle. Boy that sub guy is making sushi out of tiger shark. This would be fun if I weren't so freakin' wet.
SLUG: Get over it, would ya! With, T.S. out of the way, Black Manta appears to confront the duo. This is the guy who killed Aquaman's son! B.M. and A.M. appear to be jousting verbally! I imagine they have a lot to talk
FERRET: Talk, talk, talk. Could this get more boring? OOH!. Cool. Apparently Subby agrees. I'm no expert but that had to hurt. Manta has to regret showing up. Looks like the Manta has had enough. Bet he's headed for
land. Wish I were.
SLUG: Yeah, Subby really pounded him! It looks like he's having problems with the ol' life support system. I'm thinking he's chum! But, this could be trouble for our fishy pair! The disturbance has apparently aroused
Terrag's attention. This could get interesting!
FERRET: As I see it, Manta's the lucky one. He gets to go dry off. And what kind of a name is Terrag? Probably some scrawny critter with Tyrannosaurus arms.
SLUG: No, he's an ugly hulking beast! Apparently, Prince Namor's blood is boiling for battle! He tears into Terrag with all he's got! Terrag is down! No wait, he's up again, and hits Subby with a roundhouse from way back!
Woah! S.M. went flying a few city blocks!
FERRET: Subby looks ticked off now. Terrag is in deep kimchi. I really like this sub guy. His attitude reminds me of Spawn. At least Spawn does things on land. You know, where battles should take place. God, I'm wet and
I'm sick of it. It looks like the sub dude has Terrag on the run. I say run, figuratively, anything that large can't really run.
SLUG: No, look! He was setting Subby up! He pounded the walls and about a ton of rock fell on Subby! Hey, have you seen Aquaman?
FERRET: Yeah. He was over by that cave with some little girl. They were swimming off together. She seemed pretty happy to see him, so I figured they knew each other.
SLUG: That's it! Aquaman has Princess Ariel! Subby, meanwhile is crawling out from underneath the rocks! He has a smile on his face! I think he's happy to find someone worthy to fight with! Aquaman is using the
distraction to slip Princess Ariel by Terrag the Ugly!
FERRET: We went through all this so Aquaman could sneak away with the princess! Cool technique. Subby does all the work, Aquaman gets all the credit. Just like I do all the work and you get all the credit. But, alas, 'tis
all in a days work.
SLUG: Yeah, but look a Subby! He appears to be having the time of his life! He and Terrag are trading massive blows! Hey, maybe that should be a battle suggestion!
FERRET: Aquaman is sending me a telepathic message that the Princess is well and in good spirits. I don't like this! If he does that again, I'll kick his ass, no matter what type of seafood he brings to the table!
SLUG: Oh, get a grip, would ya! It looks like this one's all over but the crowning!
FERRET: GOOD! Can we go now? Between the sea slugs (I mean no disrespect) and the seaweed in my underwear, I'm ready for dry land.