Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

May 2, 2008

The high price of gas continues to cause more problems for our bozos. From Lambertville, Michigan, comes the story of bozo arsonist Robert Mills who needed some gas to carry out another crime. Not wanting to spend his hard earned money on gas, he decided to simply siphon some out of a parked car. Unfortunately, the car he chose to siphon from was an unmarked police car that was in the neighborhood on a stakeout to catch our bozo the arsonist. And did we mention there were officers inside the car when he approached with a bucket and hose? He’s under arrest.

May 1, 2008

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Barbara Goldstein for sending in today’s report. With gas and food prices rising, our bozos have had to raise their sights as well. From Fort Worth, Texas, comes the story of a bozo who may have set the bar a little too high. Bozo Charles Farley wanted to start his own record label and he needed a little operating capital. So he tried to cash a phony check at his local bank. A phony check for $360 billion dollars. (Wonder if he asked for small bills?) Needless to say, all the zeros attracted a little attention from the teller, who stalled him while calling the cops. He’s been charged with fraud and possession of marijuana.