Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

September 2, 2005

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Jane McCormick for sending in today’s report. Our bozos for today, from Pownal, Maine, prove once again the importance of a proper getaway vehicle. Police officers were called at 4 AM to a report of a burglary at a local grocery. When the officers arrived they noticed a slow moving vehicle in the distance. Upon further inspection, it was found to be a golf cart, loaded down with beer, cigarettes and two bozos. They’re under arrest.

September 1, 2005

Bozo criminal for today proves once again what we’ve said many times…bozos and technology just don’t mix. Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Glen Snow for sending in this one from the International File in Rosario, Argentina. Three bozos stole some fertilizer from Petrobras Energy. While they were there one of them spotted a cell phone, one with a built in camera. And, as you know, it’s a genetic thing; bozos just can’t resist taking pictures of themselves in action. Only one problem, this phone had been set up so that any pictures taken were automatically posted on a personal webpage. The cops were able to identify and track down our bozos simply by visiting the website.