Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

September 10, 2001

bozo criminal for today comes from Johnson County, Texas where bozo Kristopher Hardy wanted to go home to visit family and friends, but he had no transportation. So he did what any bozo would do, he tried to steal a freight train. I emphasize tried because, while he was able to get the engines started, he didn’t know how to release the brake. So he called Union Pacific dispatchers for help. The conductor and engineer sent over by the dispatcher overpowered our bozo and called the cops

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