Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

February 5, 2001

Thanks to several Bozo News Hawks for pointing out this one. From Cleveland, Ohio comes the story of bozo Maxim Zukoff who had hoped to pull off a robbery at a computer company. He had set up an after-hours meeting with the company president and was fully prepared, wearing a bullet-proof vest and carrying a mask, duct tape, a machine gun and tons of ammunition. The robbery failed to come off, however, as the company president didn’t show up. Frustrated, our bozo headed for home and was only a couple of minutes from his destination when he got a little hot under the collar (those bullet-proof vests don’t "breathe"). He pulled over to the side of the road, got out of the car in sub-freezing weather and began removing his coat and vest. A police officer, noticing what was going on, stopped to see if he could be of any assistance. When he noticed that our bozo was sweating profusely despite the cold, the officer took a look inside the car and spotted our bozo’s tools of the trade. He’s now cooling off in jail.

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