Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

September 25, 2000

From Longview, Texas comes the story of a couple of bozos who got what they wanted and then didn’t know what to do with it. It seems our bozos broke into a convenience store on Bill Owens Parkway, grabbed an ATM machine and hauled it out. Part one of their plan worked just fine. It was part two that caused all the trouble. Our bozo’s getaway car was a Ford Tempo and was too small to fit the ATM into the seat or trunk. So, our bozos hoisted the ATM onto the roof of their car and slowly crept away. You would expect that a car with an ATM on top would attract some attention, which it did. Cops followed the bozos for a short distance until they made a sharp turn and the ATM toppled from the roof onto the roadway.

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