Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

March 01, 2000

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Greg Branch who passed along today’s report. From Longview, Texas comes the story of bozo Larry Warner who was behaving rather suspiciously in the Sav-a-Lot grocery store. When our bozo attempted to leave the store with a large package underneath his shirt, the store manager took off after him, chasing him out into the parking lot. Our bozo threw down the package of pork ribs he was hiding and ran, with the manager in hot pursuit. He then tried unsuccessfully to flag down several passing cars before finally jumping into the back of a pickup truck that had stopped at a red light. Unfortunately, our bozo picked the wrong pickup to jump into. It was driven by an off duty police officer who quickly took him into custody.

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