Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

January 03, 2000

Bozo criminal for today comes from Astoria, Oregon where bozo Roberto Garcia was pulled over by the cops for erratic driving. The investigating officer noticed our bozo was rather fidgity and after a few minutes the bozo was literally squirming in his seat. When the cop asked him what was wrong, the bozo blurted out, "I’ve got a bag of cocaine in my pants and it’s burning me!" He then asked the officer if he could please help him get it out. Don’t know if the cop actually helped, but a bag of cocaine was recovered from the bozo’s shorts and he was sent to jail.

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