Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

October 27, 1999

Bozo criminal for today comes from Providence, Rhode Island where bozo David Preston had just been released from jail. Not having a job and needing money, he headed straight for the local bank…with the intention of robbing it. Since he’d been in jail for a while, he was not real familiar with the layout of the bank, so he walked up to the first group of windows he saw and announced that this was a holdup. The woman looked up at him and said, "Sorry, you’re in the wrong department. This is the loan department. The tellers with the cash are on the other side of the lobby." Being a polite bozo he thanked her and walked over to the teller’s window where there was a line. Our bozo took his place at the back of the line and waited his turn. While he was waiting, the cops were called and arrived just as our bozo was attempting his getaway.

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