Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

3 12, 1999

From the International File…. From Stettler, Canada comes the story of bozo David Yates who was stopped by the police after the car he was driving was seen weaving down the highway. Believing the suspect to be intoxicated, police placed our bozo in the back of the patrol car. While sitting in the back of the car, Mr. Yates ripped off his underwear and began to try to eat it. Yes, he was actually eating his own shorts. His idea was that the cotton fabric would absorb the alcohol before he had to take the breathalyzer test. Don’t know how he did on that test, but he just scored the first perfect 100 on the Bozo exam.

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