Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

1 6, 1998

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Miller Duncan who passed along today’s report via the internet. From Cambridge, Massachusetts comes the story of Bozo Dwaine Jones who was in jail on drug charges. Our bozo hatched an escape plot with a couple of his buddies on the outside. According to the plan, our bozo would lower a rope made of sheets and blankets out the 18th floor jail window. The friends on the ground would tie a gun to the rope and the bozo would hoist it back up to be used in his escape. Two problems: 1. A ledge a few stories down blocked the rope and prevented it from ever reaching the accomplices on the ground. 2. The plan was hatched within earshot of guards who were prepared and had the area under heavy surveillance. The two accomplices were arrested and the bozo was moved to a more secure cell.

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