Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

12 31, 1998

This week it’s our annual Bozo Year in Review as we present the best stories from the year gone by. Best of ’98The Bozo criminal for today comes from Dallas, Texas where bozo Jerome Sessions walked into the Federal Reserve Bank of Dallas at 6:30 one morning. The Federal Reserve Bank is not an actual bank and has no tellers so our bozo presented a note to an armed security guard. The note was very specific. It said, "This is a bank robbery of the Dallas Federal Reserve Bank of Dallas, Texas. Give me all the money. Thank you." He then signed his full name. The guard politely took the note and pressed a silent security alarm. While they were waiting, the bozo made small talk, saying, "Well, I’m here to rob you. Is this where the money is? I tried to rob the post office but they threw me out." By this time, the police arrived and arrested our bozo.

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