Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

2 27, 1997

BBozo criminal for today comes from Chicago, IL. Gary Michaels was a Bozo who had been spending a lot of time peering thru a jewelry store window and dreaming about all the wonderful things inside. He finally decided to quit dreaming and just steal the stuff. His idea: smash the window, grab the jewelry and run. A thick pane of glass covered the window, so it would take a lot of effort to break it. Gary had just the plan–he spotted a manhole cover just a couple of steps away from the window. He would pry the hundred pound disc from the sidewalk and heave it thru the window. So far, his plan was working. He grabbed all the rings, watches and diamonds he could carry and took off running down the sidewalk. Suddenly, our Bozo disappeared from sight…down the open manhole.

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