Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

Out Through the In Door

Bozo criminal for today from Rockville, Maryland, violated Bozo Rule Number 858585: Use the “Exit” door. A man who had forgotten exactly where he parked his car in a multi-story parking garage was surprised to encounter it being driven in the wrong direction by our bozo, who was apparently trying to steal it. Our bozo drove up to an entrance gate but found it blocked by an arm that wouldn’t lift. The man asked him what he was doing and he tried to play it cool by saying the Mercedes was his wife’s car and he wasn’t sure how to drive it, even going as far as pretending to call her on his cell phone. Our bozo then gave up, got out of the car and simply walked away. He was nowhere to be found when the police arrived. The owner said, as far as he could determine, all our bozo got away with was seven dollars and two packs of Marlboros.

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