Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

The Force Was Not With Him

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Troy House for sending in today’s report from Jacksonville Beach, Florida, where bozo Jacob Martin entered a convenience store in a full Darth Vader costume. Instead of a light saber he was toting a handgun, which he pointed at the clerk while demanding cash. The clerk, obviously not in fear of the Sith Lord, reached behind him and grabbed a jar of blue cheese salad dressing which he hurled at Mr. Vader, striking him dead-on in the helmet. This caused our bozo to beat a hasty retreat, where he was seen outside removing his helmet before getting in his car and driving away. Using eyewitness accounts, the cops were able to track down Darth who was found to be bleeding from the bridge of his nose. He’s under arrest.

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