Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

Assault With a Jiggly Weapon

Bozo criminal for today comes from the International File in Belfast, Northern Ireland, where cops were called to a report of a dispute. Upon arrival they found two neighbors who had been arguing, resulting in one of them being knocked to the ground and injuring her back. It was her unusual claim of the weapon he used that landed our perp in the Bozo Hall of Fame. The woman told the cops that in the midst of the argument, our bozo attempted to move her out of the way by “belly bumping” her with his sizeable stomach. The impact of the belly blow caused her to be knocked down and suffer the injury. He’s been charged with assault.

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