Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Howard Rost for sending in today’s report from Lane County, Oregon. Bozo Alex Kowalski was being held in the County Jail and decided the best way to get out quick was to cook up a police brutality charge. He said he wanted to file assault charges against several officers and had the bruises and a black eye to prove his claim. What he didn’t count on was a camera just outside his cell that caught him hitting himself in the head 45 times in the space of four minutes. He’s now had filing a false report and attempted coersion charges added to his rap sheet. Next time we recommend a padded cell.