Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Bob Hammond for sending in today’s report which is a little short on criminal activity but has plenty of bozo to go around. Police in Daytona Beach, Florida, received a 911 call from Bozo John Alexander who claimed he and his girlfriend, Amber Costello, were trapped in a janitor’s closet at the Marine and Enviornmental Science Center. An officer tracked the phone’s location and freed our bozos, who claimed to have been trapped in the closet for two days. Only problem, the officer said the closet door wasn’t locked. Hmmm. After finding no drugs in the closet, our bozos were charged with two counts of illegal trespassing and one parole violation.