Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

It’s the Big One…

Bozo criminals for today from Polk County, Florida, thought they had come up with the ultimate plan to rob Walmart. Bozos Tarus Sloan and Genard Dawson entered the store and filled their cart with a load of Christmas gifts, including a motorized Barbie Power Wheel. As they approached the checkout counter, bozo Genard dropped to the floor, clutching his chest and doing his best Fred Sanford imitation. While everyone’s attention was turned to the medical emergency, bozo Tarus headed for the exit and left the store without paying. After about 45 seconds of moaning and groaning, bozo Genard was able to struggle to his feet and walk out of the store. Perfect crime and clean getaway, right? Wrong. Guess they forgot about the security cameras, which caught them reuniting in the parking lot and driving away. Oops. They’ll be spending Christmas in jail.

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