Bozo criminal for today comes from Miami, Florida, where our unidentified bozo headed down to a local adult store to apply for a job. The manager had her fill out an application and, after she left, noticed a sex toy had gone missing. She took a look at the surveillance video and, sure enough, there was our bozo “fumbling around in the front of her pants and shirt” in an effort to conceal the device. The cops had no trouble in tracking down our bozo, who used the old “really drunk” excuse. Didn’t work. She’s under arrest.