Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

Where Are Those Earplugs?

Our bozo for today comes from Waukesha, Wisconsin, where the 911 operator took a rather unusual call. The man on the other end of the line said that he wanted “a female removed from his bed.” He said he was not sure how she had gotten into his apartment but she was “snoring like a train” and he needed help in getting her out. Uncertain exactly what the situation was, police officers were dispatched to the residence where they did indeed find a snoring woman in the man’s bed. However, after further questioning the man admitted that he did know the woman, and had shared some drinks with her before she crawled into his bed and started sawing logs. The officers reminded our bozo that no crime had been committed since he did invite her into his home. They advised him to take to the couch for the evening and work things out in the morning.

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