Bozo criminal for today comes from New York City, where an unidentified bozo walked into a Chase Bank branch in the Garment District and handed the teller a note reading, “I have a bomb. Give me some money now.” The unflappable teller told our bozo that she didn’t read notes and instructed him to fill our a withdrawal slip instead. Our bozo complied, writing the same message on the slip. The teller then told him he would have to swipe his bank card while telling a colleague in Spanish that she was being robbed. Becoming frustrated, our bozo said, “Ma’am, I ain’t got no time for this!” He then grabbed a fistful of lolllipops and ran out of the bank where he was quickly apprehended by the cops.