Bozo criminal for today comes from the International File in Kalmar, Sweden, where our unidentified bozo called the cops in a panic to say that his wife was missing from his sailboat. He was certain that she must have fallen overboard and drowned. When the police arrived they found the man to be extremely intoxicated. So drunk, in fact, that he had forgotten that she did not accompany him on the trip. The wife, as it turns out, was safe at home. He’s been arrested for boating while intoxicated.