Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

March 11, 2011

We’re all familiar with Clemenza’s instruction, "Leave the gun, take the cannoli." We’re not sure exactly what our bozo for today took, but what he left behind sure wasn’t a cannoli. From the International File in Copenhagen, Denmark, comes the story of an unidentified bozo who sneaked into a bank vault on Friday only to find himself trapped there until the bank reopened on Monday. Returning bank employees got the surprise of their lives when our bozo burst out of the vault with a large amount of cash and jewelry. He might have made a clean getaway except for what he left behind. During three days in the vault, he had to relieve himself several times. And he left the waste in glass bottles. Police were able to ID his DNA from the samples. He’s under arrest.

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