Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Shad Bickering for sending in today’s report. From Athens, Georgia, comes the story of bozo Demetrius Russell who wanted to hold up a convenience store, but when he got there it was very busy with customers. So, to kill time while the store emptied, he asked for a job application, which he filled out with his real name and turned in to the clerk. He then threatened the clerk with a knife, getting away with a small amount of cash. He may need to update his resume now, as he’s currently residing in jail.