Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

June 6, 2006

Thanks to several Bozo News Hawks for alerting us to this one from Fort Worth, Texas. Bozo Larry Bates broke into a liquor store. Unfortunately for him, the breaking in part was just about the only part he got right. Once inside, he crawled a short distance through the ceiling before it gave way, sending him crashing 20 feet to the floor. A store security camera then captured the rest of his adventure. After about five minutes he came to, staggered to the cash register and grabbed some cigarettes. Now, for his getaway. He attempted to climb back up to the ceiling using a make-shift ladder, but it collapsed. So, he tried to break the store’s plexiglas door with a beer keg. No luck. He then tried to use a dolly, first slamming it against the door and then trying to use it to pry the door open. Again, no luck. Sensing that his goose was cooked, our bozo lit himself a cigarette and sat down on the keg to wait for the police to come by and arrest him, which they did.

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