Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

March 21, 2006

Bozo criminals for today come from Benicia, California, where two bozos had big plans to hold up the local credit union. They donned ski masks and rushed into the First Pacific Credit Union around noon. With handguns drawn, our bozos ordered the employees to lie down on the floor and then instructed one of them to hand over all the money. And that’s when things started to go downhill. You see, there was no money to be had. Our bozos had chosen to rob what’s known as a "cashless credit union" where all money is deposited directly into a vault that is inaccessible to credit union employees. Oops…

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