Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

September 28, 2005

The ever rising price of gasoline continues to give our bozos problems. Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Alana Cooper for sending in today’s report from Muncie, Indiana where bozo Charles Haynes came up with an ambitious plan. He drove his van to a gas station that was closed for the night, inserted a hose into the station’s underground tank, connected his battery operated pump and began siphoning the gas from the tank into a 55 gallon container he had installed in the back of his van. It was a rather slow process and it had been a long day, so our bozo decided to take himself a little nap. It must have been a pretty big nap, since the manager found him asleep in front of the station when he reported to work the following morning. He’s now catching up on his sleep in jail.

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