Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

May 13, 2004

Bozo criminal for today comes from the International File in Dusseldorf, Germany where bozo Marko Nunni was already waiting outside the bank before it opened up one morning. Dressed in shorts, a sleeveless shirt and a woolen hat, he attracted quite a bit of attention as he spent three hours outside, pacing around, working up the courage to go in. When he finally entered, he pulled his hat down over his face but he couldn’t see a thing because he had cut the eye holes in the wrong place. Ripping off the cap in frustration, he walked right past a security camera on the way to the teller, who he threatened with a cigarette lighter shaped like a pistol. She simply told him to get out, which he did, only to be arrested by police officers waiting outside. At his trial, the judge did a Simon Cowell on him, telling him he should find another line of work, since he was clearly unsuited for robbing banks.

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