Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

January 23, 2004

Bozo criminal for today comes from the International File in Uttoxeter, England where bozo Michael Watkins walked into a grocery store, flashed a knife and demanded money. The cashier would hear none of it and grabbed the nearest weapon, a big squeeze bottle of salad dressing, which she squirted all over him. She continued to spray him until our walking Caesar salad gave up and headed out the door. The cops were called and they were literally able to follow the trail of salad dressing along the pavement to a nearby side street where they found our bozo trying to clean himself up. He’s under arrest.

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