Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

December 17, 2003

Thanks to Bozo News Hawk Greg Denman for sending in today’s report. From Lufkin, Texas comes the story of three bozos who stopped at the local Wal Mart and asked if the large Styrofoam display of the Pillsbury Doughboy was for sale. The clerk on duty told them they would have to come back the next morning to ask the store manager. Apparently they just couldn’t wait as a few minutes later they were seen taking the display out a side door to a waiting pickup truck. The story doesn’t end there, however, as a few weeks later police were called to a loud music complaint at an apartment. And there, in the middle of the living room, was the Doughboy. As the officers tried to move him, Poppin’ Fresh’s head fell off. Underneath the head were written the words "Wal Mart" and the signatures of our three bozos. Written next to their names was a description of their job in the heist. One said, "thief", another "driver" and the third "scout." Busted!

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