Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

August 7, 2002

Bozo criminals for today violated Bozo Rule Number 7089: If you’re going to try to become a ticket scalper, be sure the tickets you are trying to sell have some value. From St. Petersburg, Florida comes the story of a team of bozos who had hopes of getting rich quick by scalping sports tickets. Our bozos used a stolen credit card to buy 180 tickets to a four game series between the Tampa Bay Devil Rays and the Seattle Mariners. They obviously failed to check the standings before they bought the tickets. The Devil Rays are the worst team in baseball and their attendance is the lowest in the league. In fact there were more than 125,000 empty seats for those four games. Needless to say there was almost no demand for the tickets and our bozos had sold only a couple before they were caught by the cops.

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