Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

August 27, 2002

Bozo criminal for today comes from Chicago, Illinois where perhaps a little research on the part of our bozos would have helped out. Bozo Thomas Ingram and two of his buddies broke into a closed Chicago restaurant last Thursday evening and pried the ATM machine from its bolts. They then attempted to toss the contraption into the back seat of their 1993 Cadillac DeVille. While this is a large car, the back seat wasn’t quite large enough for an ATM, so they took off with the back door half open and the ATM partially hanging out. Not surprisingly, this attracted a police officer who pulled them over and made the arrest. It was what they didn’t know about the machine that made them true bozos. The ATM had been out of order, and money, for more than two years. And the restaurant owner had been trying to figure out how to get rid of the useless machine.

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