Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

July 16, 2002

Bozo criminal for today violated seldom used Bozo Rule Number 9080: It’s best to leave the manufacture of fireworks to a professional. From Chicago, Illinois comes the story of bozos James Kowalski and Josh Fineman who wanted to celebrate the Fourth of July but just weren’t willing to pay the high prices for fireworks. So they decided to make some of their own. They filled 10 small balloons with explosive acetylene gas and planned to ignite them at a party later in the day. Loading up their car to head to the party they threw the balloons in the back and slammed the door. A spark ignited the balloons, blowing up the car and throwing our bozos several feet. They suffered only minor cuts and burns, can’t say the same for their car. Next time they’d probably better stick to Black Cats.

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